- 11-06-2011, 07:36 PM #9
i was thinking the same as penguinsix. it HAS happened to me before. every time i tried to x out of the pop up, it'd open 5 more.... i had to scrub my computer once because of it.
- 11-07-2011, 12:16 AM #10Registered User
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on a separate note, is the computer always in her room and non-accessible by either your husband or your 15y old son? you might want to consider this so as not to accuse the wrong person.
the second question i would have is what an 'obscene' website is that could do so much harm to your family as your describe. any website with a chat function could do the same harm, so you might want to prohibit her from using facebook too.
- 11-07-2011, 12:39 AM #11Registered User
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Honestly, I think that if it's your house and your property you can feel completely free to stipulate what it can be used for. The argument could be made that if she's allowed to watch television that pay-per-view porn rented via that source is okay too. If you feel uncomfortable about it you don't need to justify your reason--either here or to her--you just tell her you don't like it and you don't want her to do it. Honestly, I think that's disrespectful use of someone's property--if it is the case that that's what she's using it for. If she really wants to view porn she probably should find her own personal source to do it through (own computer or DVD player). But, I think it depends on what your own standards for your home are. If you're okay with other members in your home doing so then it would be a double standard to not be okay with her doing so. In our home none of us view porn and I think that if our helper was it would be super disrespectful to us. But again, it's what you're comfortable with because it's your home. And that pretty much goes for most things along these lines.
“Many women have described their experiences of childbirth as being associated with a
spiritual uplifting, the power of which they have never previously been aware …
To such a woman childbirth is a monument of joy within her memory.
She turns to it in thought to seek again an ecstasy which passed too soon.”
~ Grantly Dick-Read (Childbirth Without Fear)
Mother of Two
JMW, boy, born November 29, 2007, 9:43 pm, USA
MJW, girl, born March 17, 2011, 4:14 pm, HK
- 11-07-2011, 01:08 AM #12
just to clarify, porn pop ups don't only happen when viewing a porn site. it has happened to me once, when i was on a totally non-porn site that a porn pop up came up and when i clicked it out, it had a cascade effect.
it isn't necessarily that she is viewing porn, it might be a totally unrelated site and then the pop up cascade happens.
- 11-07-2011, 02:28 AM #13Registered User
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Thankfully using a Mac means that I don't deal with viruses and pop-ups generally. But...my advice is that if you suspect that's what's going on with your PC--install some super-heavy-duty anti-spyware/spamware software and set your security settings really high on your computer. There is also other software that you can get to block such sites on your computer. I know for sure I'll be installing it sometime soon on mine just so my kids don't at some point stumble across things like that. This article at eHow may be helpful.
If the issue is unintentional exposure to these sites this is the logical way to combat it. It's just a good idea to do that to your computers anyway, I think.“Many women have described their experiences of childbirth as being associated with a
spiritual uplifting, the power of which they have never previously been aware …
To such a woman childbirth is a monument of joy within her memory.
She turns to it in thought to seek again an ecstasy which passed too soon.”
~ Grantly Dick-Read (Childbirth Without Fear)
Mother of Two
JMW, boy, born November 29, 2007, 9:43 pm, USA
MJW, girl, born March 17, 2011, 4:14 pm, HK
- 11-07-2011, 02:34 AM #14
it was years ago and hasn't happened since (i did install anti spy-ware etc). my point was only that it MAY be unintentional on the helper's part. my advice to the OP is not to jump to conclusions, but by all means broach the subject and say that now that the software is installed, if you find it again, you will have to either limit her computer time to public areas or remove the computer all together.
- 11-07-2011, 07:09 AM #15
- 11-07-2011, 07:50 AM #16Registered User
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Thanks again for responses.
To clarify with one poster, our son is 15 months, not years and the laptop is used solely by the helper - any sites visited on the pc is by her.
We are very conscious not to jump to conclusions and the last thing we want to do is humiliate and embarrass her. We have definitely confirmed google searches for 2 porn searches/sites and we think some of the more obscene site names dirtypriest.com may be pop ups. We don't view this type of material and prefer she doesn't either as I think it can degenerate and I don't believe she has the skills to know when it crosses the line.
As a total side issue - she could damage our property with harmful viruses - i gave her hints on both the issues and she didn't pick up on it.
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