- 02-02-2006, 01:30 PM #1Registered User
- Join Date
- Mar 2005
- Dongguan China
Hello All...my 6 month old has been sleeping with the helper(baby in her own cot, helper in her own bed) since birth. She sleeps thru the night once in a while if sleeping thru the nite is considered 5 hrs straight. I'd like to stretch this to 8 hrs if possible.I have been sleep training her but the biggest problem seems that she will cry herself to sleep after 15-20 minutes and then sleep for about 30 minutes and then continue to cry after she's had a quick nap. She'll do this all night long. Usually if the helper is sleeping next to her, she'll wake much less...only once a night This is GREAT except I'm afraid my baby will be too reliant on "someone being next to her" in order to sleep. So I guess my question is, should I move the maid out of the room and then sleep train her? Also, if she keeps crying to sleep and then only sleeping for half an hr to an hr then crying again, should I just not enter the room until 6am or do the Ferber way and keep checking on her? I'm so confused...I've read all the books and not one way really works. I have been exclusively breastfeeding until just recently with starting solids. I've tried taking her into bed with me to sleep and she'll suck the night away until she gets a tummy ache and a few big poops which then require me to get up to change. Either way, I'm not getting as much sleep as I'd like. Does anyone have the same problem here? Sorry for the long note........
- 02-02-2006, 10:44 PM #2Registered User
- Join Date
- May 2003
- Discovery Bay
Another alternative to lots of crying is a more gradual approach such as that described in the No Cry Sleep Solution book by Elizabeth Pantley (I think they have it in the Geobaby shop). You'll have to read it for more details but that describes how to withdraw gradually, which may take a long time but would certainly be less traumatic. The Babywhisperer also outlines a method that involves the "pick up/put down" method, where you are constantly reassuring your baby that you are there but still teaching her to go to sleep by herself, which is less harsh than the cry-it-out methods but might achieve faster results than the Pantley approach.
Hope you find some ideas that will work for you in those books!
- 02-05-2006, 09:08 AM #3Registered User
- Join Date
- May 2005
I have yet to meet a 'real; mother (and by real, I mean face to face, not over the net - ha ha) who says that the Baby Whisperer pat/shh routine works. Like a lot of other sleep advice, it's works great in theory.
Why do we expect children to all sleep through the night by 'x' month? I have friends whose babies still wake up 2-3 times at 18 months. My husband apparently (and I use the word with great humour) slept through from the first night home - or so my in-laws like to tell me!
If your baby always wakes afer 30 minutes, I would go in just before this time, and try to re-settle her before she really wakes up.
Have you thought about using a dummy? Just for re-settling purposes? Or mayeb she's not getting enough to eat before bedtime?
- 02-05-2006, 12:53 PM #4Registered User
- Join Date
- Nov 2004
- Hong Kong
Hi, I have used a mix of letting my duaghter cry and also going in and picking her up when she wont settle, put her back down, again and again etc. My daughter is now 4 months and has been sleeping through as such from about 10 weeks. We do a small top up feed (she is bottle feed by the way!) at 10pm, which we are going to drop from tomorrow night (fingers crossed) and she sleeps until 7am. Lately, every now and again she doesn't seem happy to be put down, even though she is very tired, and will start to really cry and work herself up. Now we just let her cry and time it, as even a short period of crying seems like an hour and the longest she has cried for is 7 minutes. We don't use a dummy as we started to when she was very young and would wake up once it fell out of her mouth - now she sucks her thumb to settle herself and then lets it go and stays asleep. This way should she wake up (which does happen now and again) she can settle herself to sleep without assistance. I have also been told by "people" that when the baby shares a room with someone else they start to get used to that persons breathing and noises and will often become dependant on those noises to settle. Why not take the maid out, try the patting and settling (baby whisp) routine and let her cry a little and see how you go? I have also found with our daughter that a structured nap and feeding routine druing the day really helps as she gets used to going to bed at a certain time. Good luck!
- 02-15-2006, 01:53 PM #5Registered User
- Join Date
- Jun 2005
- Guangzhou, China
my son who is 2.5 years old sleeps with us now. he used to sleep in his own room with the nanny, but we have let go of her since. Now, i don't have any idea as to when i can move him back to his room again. He will sleep on his own during afternoon naps (with me putting him to sleep and leaving the room), but this doesn't happen at night time. What i have observed is after sleeping for about 4-5hours, he tends to move around and look for me (smell? feeling for me) and if im not there, then he wakes up completely and starts to cry. But if I am there, then he goes right back to sleep until the morning. No waking up in the middle of the night at all. I am afraid that if i put him in his room, then i will end up going back and forth through the night, which is not good for both of us as he goes to kindy and i go to work. So, there, no solution in my mind really.. would appreciate tips.
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