[LLL_Sarah]

Dear Lynn,

The traditional suggestion from LLL is called “don’t offer, don’t refuse”. This method does work but it can take a long time – often much longer than mothers feel comfortable with. This doesn’t mean that you don’t encourage the baby to wean by talking about it. We talk about growing older with small children and that one day they will be potty trained , go to big school, etc weaning is just another thing that babies/small children will do and therefore something that a mother encourages by discussing it with her child.

This subject is so huge that it is difficult to make suggestions without writing a book. And so I’m going to recommend a few books that we have in our library to you instead. Unfortunately we only lend our books to members as too many of them went ‘walk about’ before this policy. Please contact Maggie at 2817-7475 if you are interested in borrowing any of these books.

1. Mothering your Nursing Toddler, Norma Jane Bumgarner
Practical, reassuring, informative, and supportive book for the mother of a nursing toddler. Emphasizes meeting child's needs. Discusses importance of breastfeeding relationship, natural weaning, temporary changes in lifestyle, society's expectations vs. child's and family's needs.

2. Nursing Mothers Guide to Weaning, Kathleen Huggins & Linda Ziedrich
Explores all aspects of weaning beginning with an historical survey of weaning practices and ending with weaning a child over three and life after weaning. Discusses reasons for weaning as well as reasons to delay weaning; offers practical and helpful advice that respects the needs and feelings of both mother and child.

3. How Weaning Happens, LLLI
This book includes the personal experiences of mothers who have weaned in a variety of ways. It covers the kinds of questions parents have about natural weaning, explains how weaning can be accomplished at various ages, what to do if weaning is necessary for medical reasons, how to handle pressure from others, how mothers feel about weaning, and what to do if weaning isn't going well. Above all, it reassures parents that weaning is a natural developmental process.

If you are interested to continue the nursing relationship then Mothering Your Nursing Toddler will give you lots of support for that option. The book with the most suggestions of ways to stop breastfeeding is Nursing Mother’s Guide to Weaning. I like this book because it splits the child into different age groups. A method what works well with a baby of six months is no use when discussing a child of three years. And How Weaning Happens is a nice book because it gives so many stories of what other mothers have done.

Best wishes,
SARAH

[lynn cheung]

Thanks Sarah! Will call her about the books.

[mammalicious]

Sarah

i know you said not to worry to much. but when i feed my baby before the solids, she sometimes only drinks for 5-10minutes before she starts looking around and seeming like she doesnt want anymore. i keep trying to offer back and forth between the breasts to get her to drink until about 15-20min have elapsed. surely 5min is not enough time to get a lot of milk considering she used to feed for 45min or more?

[LLL_Sarah]

As babies grow they get much more efficient at drinking. 5 to 10 minutes is fine for a feed as the baby grows older. My second child never drank for more than 10 minutes in one go from being about two months old.

If you don’t believe this ask a bottle feeding mother how long it takes to feed a small bottle to a four week old and how long it takes to feed a big bottle to a four month or eight month old. All babies get more efficient as they get older.

How long the baby feeds doesn’t tell you much. It is better to look at other signs that all is well:
How many wet nappies?
What is the weight gain like?
More importantly what is the height gain like?
Is the baby meeting her developmental milestones?
Etc.

It is always more important to look and see what the baby is like and how she is acting rather than worrying about how long and much she feeds.

Best wishes,
SARAH