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Miscarriage

  1. #1
    PMH
    PMH is offline Registered User
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    Miscarriage

    I'm not sure which forum to ask this, so sorry if this
    is the wrong one. My wife is in the process of having
    a miscarriage (after about 8 weeks), and her obstetrician
    recommends surgery (a D&C). She is having difficulty
    choosing among the options (just wait, take pills, have surgery)
    Has anyone else had the experience of choosing among these
    options at this stage?
    Has anyone had this surgery in Hong Kong?
    Does anyone know a doctor you trust to do it?


  2. #2
    mulk is offline Registered User
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    Sorry to hear about your loss.

    We had a similar experience about 4 years ago. We were given the choice to either wait it out and let nature take its course or to have a D & C. I ended up choosing the D & C. Dr. Philip Ho did the surgery up at the Matilda. He was very sensitive and caring. The actual surgery only took about 30 minutes. I went back for a check up after my next normal period and was told that we could try again at that point if we felt ready. We did and were pregnant right away. Our son is now 3 years old.


  3. #3
    Bear Lau is offline Registered User
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    Sorry to hear about it too.

    I had same experience about 1.5years ago. I also given the choice, but if you choose to let nature take the course then you are running a risk that it doesn't fully come out and still end up with a D&C. Dr. macor Wan did it in his own clinic and the own process is only around 30 mins. The reason I didn't goes to the hospital is that I don't want to have bad memory. We waited for two months before we try again. My daughter is 6 months now.

    Bear Lau:

  4. #4
    Kimmi's Avatar
    Kimmi is offline Registered User
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    So so sorry to hear your news, but keep strong, positive and dont give up. Miscarriages are very common. Ive had 2 miscarriages. One in the UK and one in Australia. Both times I had a D&C recommended by the Doctors. Yes you could just let nature take its course but always run a risk of getting a major infection after and ending up in hospital anyway.
    I now have 2 healthy beautifull children. Best of luck to you


  5. #5
    francobellini is offline Registered User
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    miscarriage

    Dear PMH:

    You're a very thoughtful partner and I'm sorry for your loss. My experience with miscarriage is very different from the other posters. I have had two miscarriages = one at 8 weeks like your wife - and one at 13 weeks. Both times I let nature take its course and was in contact with my doctor both by telephone and then check-up visits.

    It's not easy either way. Having a D&C is a medical procedure and things can go wrong. Just having to get to the hospital or doctor's office when you're bleeding is not easy.

    The body is meant to naturally take care of miscarriages and, most of the time, it does its job beautifully. If you choose to just stay home and let nature take its course, it will be very apparent to you and your wife whether there's something wrong. And, as soon as she can, she should get checked by a doctor. Any good OB/GYN can help with this. There are many good recommendations on this site.

    During my last miscarriage, my husband took off work and he climbed into bed with me. We just spent the whole day reading and talking and healing. It was really important. Our midwives at the time reminded us that it's emotionally very taxing and to give ourselves time to mourn together (and separately). Something about just going through it together and coming out the other side made us stronger and certainly helped me to heal emotionally and physically much sooner.

    I'd be happy to talk to your wife about this if it would be helpful. We have an amazing 4 year old daughter who was conceived 5 months after the first miscarriage. The midwife said it was nature's way.

    My best to you during this time.


  6. #6
    hkaussie is offline Registered User
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    So sorry for this, PMH. It is always a sad and difficult time.


  7. #7
    PMH
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    Thank you

    Thank you all for your kind and helpful messages!


  8. #8
    Jojo is offline Registered User
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    Dear Pmh,

    I had a miscarriage a few months ago and it started with some spotting early in the morning followed by more light bleeding later in the day and finally in the evening, I experienced severe abdominal cramps, which over the phone, acc. to the doctor, was the baby trying to come out.

    My doctor is a strong believer in letting nature takes its course and advised me to just let it all come out on its own, which happened over the course of about 10-12 days, very much like a prolonged menstruation. I didn't get an infection and apart from the inconvenience of bleeding, no discomfort either
    I am glad a D&C was not needed in my case as it is still a surgical procedure after all and can take its toll. After I sopped bleeding, he said that there was not reason why we could not immediately continue fertility treatment which was how I got pregnant in the first place.

    Good Luck to you and your wife!


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