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baby won't sleep

  1. #1
    joannek is offline Registered User
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    Unhappy baby won't sleep

    my daughter is 21 mths old. she's very used to putting to sleep by nanny (sometimes rocked, if possible just pat). since i had a very difficult time breastfeeding her in the beginning, i didn't have the energy to put her to sleep myself in the first 6 mths. but since then i've been trying to put her to sleep, but she just won't. she'd try to play with me if i'm in her room.

    we have established a very good bedtime routine (dinner, bath, grobag, milk in the crib, lights off, same lullaby CD, and not allowed on the floor) since she was 2 months, so she knows she's suppose to sleep. before she'd play with me in her crib. then i'll leave the room, and nanny will carry her or pat her, she'd sleep in 5-15 mins. recently, i want to put her to sleep without nanny, cos she's leaving soon. 1st we started a mickey mouse bedtime story with dad. but she'd ask for the bedtime story over & over again. when we told her it's the last time, she'd cry. then i'll take over & she'd ask me to carry her & rock her with our special CD, but she lies on my shoulders, enjoying the closeness. everytime i tried to put her down she'd say no no. when i call nanny to come in, she'd say bye bye to nanny. so she obviously enjoys my company a lot, so much that she doesn't want to go to sleep. i've tried explaining, but it won't work.

    i don't wanna let her cry it out. she's a spirited/grumpy toddler. any advice?

  2. #2
    barbwong_130 is offline Registered User
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    When my first child was a toddler we moved house and she had, for the first time, a room and bed of her own. Because we only had two bedrooms I wanted her room to double up as a spare room for when visitors came so we gave her a double bed.

    This allowed me to lie with her to help her get to sleep. So we’d read books until I didn’t want to any more (she always wanted more) then we’d lie there in the dark. I found the fact that I was lying down was better than standing and holding her to sleep and becasue I was with her she was still happy. Quite quickly she came to understand that when I said I was too tired to read any more that it was time to sleep.

    At first I went in to stay with her most nights but over the years it became just the occasional night. I’m very glad I had this opportunity to chat with her as she got older. During her early teens it was the only time that she’d really open up to me and let me know what was troubling her.

  3. #3
    joannek is offline Registered User
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    thank you for sharing, barbwong.

    when we go on trips, we share the same hotel room & she would play & stay up until 11pm!! i would be exhausted & everytime i said mommy has to sleep, mommy's tired, she's go to the side of the crib & make faces at me & try to make me laugh

    finally, i'd have to swtich off all the lights, turn my back on her & pretend that i had fallen asleep, then she'd let nanny pat her to sleep.

    if she falls asleep w/ you on her side, if she wakes up & you're not there, was she scared?

  4. #4
    barbwong_130 is offline Registered User
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    If she woke up she’d come into our bedroom and depending on how tired everyone was would either stay with us or I’d take her back and lie with her again. I found the double bed a great help when I was tired because sometimes I’d wake in the morning to discover I hadn’t made it back to my own bed!. When I became pregnant with my second child I got really tired and then my husband would often go with her if she woke up.
    Last edited by barbwong_130; 11-12-2006 at 02:24 PM.

  5. #5
    ELT
    ELT is offline Registered User
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    Hi joannek,

    I'm a first time mum so I don't have any proven methods to share with you. However, one thing I know is that every baby is different, just like adults. They have their own character and needs. Maybe your little one is just trying to spend more time with you? Perhaps you need to find out why she needs you so much at night rather than changing her pattern. When I was little, my mum and dad had to take turns holding me, not to rock me to sleep, but to get me through the night without screaming and waking up the entire building. Good thing is that's just a phase and we all laugh about it now!

    Joannek, you are doing a good jobl already. Things are not always within our control. As long as your little one is healthy, don't worry about the rest too much.

    Good luck!

  6. #6
    joannek is offline Registered User
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    things have taken a drastic turn since i last made a post.

    nanny finally left last saturday. she's grown quite close with her cos she's been taking care of her since she was born. the new nanny arrived late november. meanwhile, i was worried sick since she just wouldn't let me put her to sleep at night (only at nap time). anyway, since nanny left last saturday, she dropped her nap (!!). and hasn't napped since. i did ask her whether she wants to nap, but she ignores me. by 5pm, she'd start yawning. then we start bedtime routine 30 mins earlier, and by bedtime she's so tired, she'd fall right to sleep after her milk. so keeping my fingers crossed, i hope it will continue this way.....

    which brings me to my next question - when she used to nap, she'd nap for 45mins-1 1/2 hrs, then at night she'd sleep for 10-11 hrs. since she dropped her nap, she'd sleep for 12 hours at night. so which makes the same amt of sleep time/day. is it OK for her to not nap? since she's sleeping the same amt of time each day?

  7. #7
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    carang is offline Registered User
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    in a word, yes....

    congratulations! now, do you think tha tyou can come and work your magic with my son? LOL!

  8. #8
    joannek is offline Registered User
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    LOL!! i have been praying since the new nanny arrived....

    try praying.... or so you really want my magic wand?

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