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Carry or not to carry

  1. #1
    AG2007 is offline Registered User
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    Carry or not to carry

    I've got an almost 7 week old baby and I pick her up the second she cries as I can't bear to hear her cry and believe that she is crying for a reason and it's quite mean to ignore her (even if she's fed, burped, well, changed, etc) if she wants a cuddle.
    Any thoughts on this?

  2. #2
    jamesandsimo is offline Registered User
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    hi,
    Your baby is still very young, often they just need comfort, don't feel guilty that your picking up your baby. All the baby knows is you, therefore you are her everything so if something is wrong, they need you there. I think often as mums we get caught up in 'are we getting them into a bad habit' but sometimes its less stressful on us mums if we give ourself permission to go by our instincts - if you feel like your baby needs you - pick her up, if you feel like she just needs to let out some energy before sleeping, let her do it. You'll learn what she needs.

    There is a good book called 'baby wise' i found it very helpful when it came to learning how to support the baby into getting into good sleep and feeding patterns. Once i started using this structure i found that i started to learn my babies cries, when he was hungry, needing a nappy change or burping etc.

  3. #3
    bekyboo44 is offline Registered User
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    Pick her up! At seven weeks babies are still so tiny and need all the love and comfort they can get!

    My son is almost 9 months old and is picked up everytime he cries- although at 9 months it is possible to tell the difference between a genuine upset cry and a pretend, I just want attention cry, or a I don't like being told no so I'm going to cry!

    I think the main way we comminicate with babies is through touch- and what better way to show your baby that you love her and will always be there for her than to cuddle and hug her.

    If she is fed, dry etc. maybe she's crying because she wants your attention, she wants to be with you.

    And 7 weeks is much too young to leave a baby to cry themselves to sleep. You are doing the best thing for your baby, and that's what matters!

  4. #4
    ELT
    ELT is offline Registered User
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    my boy is 9.5 months now and we have always attended to him the second he cries. He is cheerful and I don't think he has become fussier or more demanding because of how we are handling him. The only downside is he doesn't sleep on his own. He needs someone to cuddle him / lie down with him for a few minutes before he falls asleep and sometimes he would wake up in the middle of the night and he couldn't go back to sleep on his own. There were nights when we have to co-sleep with him too. We only have one kid so it's easy for us to give him all the attention he needs. I guess it would be difficult for larger families and it depends on what you and your husband want too.

  5. #5
    ctrbabe1 is offline Registered User
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    I agree, your baby is still very young and needs to know she is loved and cared for, and needs to feel secure. Don't worry that you're picking her up too much now.
    All the best,
    Katie

  6. #6
    AG2007 is offline Registered User
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    Thanks for the input everyone. It's quite bad that people are made to be so hung up about "spoiling" their children. I for one cannot bear to hear my bub cry so I do pick her up.

  7. #7
    milb is offline Registered User
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    When my girl is about 1 month old, my friends (a couple) came to visit and said I was spoiling her coz I picked her up everytime she cries. They said their boy is very disciplined coz they left him cry for at least 40 mins before picking him up since he's a newborn.

    But choice is mine and I can't bear letting her cry for that long. Now she's 4 mos old and i still don't see there is anything wrong with my way.

  8. #8
    Sleuth is offline Registered User
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    Takes a long time for a baby to develop to the point where they can be spoiled. At the earliest ages they are just thinking, "Something is wrong and mommy and daddy don't care".

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