Forums  •  Classifieds  •  Events  •  Directory

 

View Poll Results: Would you lend your helper money to pay for an operation for her mother?

Voters
47. You may not vote on this poll
  • Yes, I would but have not been asked

    9 19.15%
  • No, I wouldnt and I have not been asked

    22 46.81%
  • Yes, I would and have done in the past

    16 34.04%
Page 2 of 3 FirstFirst 123 LastLast

Would loan money to your helper?

  1. #9
    snagito is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    pokfulam
    Posts
    375
    I would lend her the money and I would believe her 100%. I trust my helper absolutely as frankly otherwise I would not let my son out of the door with her. So I would feel the need to back up that trust by believing her and lending her the money in her time of need.

    Having said that, I would also talk about the fact that I think it is not a good idea to have an outstanding loan between us as it eventually can create difficulties in the relationship - which is the reality.

  2. #10
    aussiegal is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Southside
    Posts
    660
    [QUOTE=snagito;878829]I would lend her the money and I would believe her 100%. I trust my helper absolutely as frankly otherwise I would not let my son out of the door with her. QUOTE]

    That sounds quite self righteous or did I misinterpret? I think it's naive to think you can trust anyone 100% who comes from a completely different culture to our own, with a different economic reality and where people's lives are not valued as much as they are in more well off countries. What's to say your helper isn't embarrassed to tell you the real reason why she needs money (whatever that is)?

    Actually, i don't know anyone of any nationality who is 100% honest, myself included. Doesn't make us bad people.

  3. #11
    Sage is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Pokfulam
    Posts
    100
    Quote Originally Posted by snagito View Post
    Having said that, I would also talk about the fact that I think it is not a good idea to have an outstanding loan between us as it eventually can create difficulties in the relationship - which is the reality.
    Hi snagito - I have been wondering about this. I'm not comfortable with my helper taking a loan from us but I figure that it is the better of the two devils. I don't want finance companies chasing her down and I'd want to get clued in, at the very least, if she's having dire financial problems. Lending her money when she needs it for emergencies helps me understand her situation better and in turn, I can be prepared and also help her, if needed.

    So far, our relationship hasn't changed (yet) although I find that she gets lazier and more absent-minded these days but I've been told that this happens sometimes and I just have to deal with it.

    Thus, I'm interested to know, specifically, what kind of difficulties that can be created from this relationship. I hope that me, lending her money is not making her more absent-minded and lazier.

  4. #12
    Portia is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Hong Kong
    Posts
    502
    It depends on how much money. I have given advances on salary of a few thousand to most of my helpers, but my current helper needed to borrow $35K to repay a loan. We said no as she was new and we weren't sure whether she would be sticking around long enough for us to get repayment by instalments from her monthly salary if we repaid the loan for her.
    Last edited by Portia; 09-04-2008 at 02:03 PM. Reason: Typos

  5. #13
    mum22 is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    HK
    Posts
    2
    Thanks for all of your honest replies. I respect and trust my helper, but then still cannot be 100% sure that the money is for what she says it is for, or that I will get it all back. But saying that I will give her the benefit of the doubt and probably lend her the money.

    I agree culturally we are in different positions from our helpers, and I personally cannot completely understand how it feels to live so far from home, family and children, and what the pressure of putting food into those mouths must feel like. Saying that I have to believe that the majority of people are good and honest, and hope this is the right thing to do.

  6. #14
    aussiegal is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Southside
    Posts
    660
    Portia, wow a $35 k loan. That's some cheek even asking for it. It's a ton of cash by any standards let alone for a new helper. I completely understand saying no.

    Sage, this is probably a horrible thing to say but our first helper got wind that we were going to fire her so she came up with a story about needing money for her sick father (who she had already told us was dead...). We figured it was her way of ensuring we wouldn't fire her. i.e we'd want our money back and keep her on as long as it took.

    Needless to say we didn't give her the loan and did fire her a month later for unrelated matters.

    I have found that of the three helpers we've had in 18 months (yeah not much good at hiring!) the first two got lazier the more generous we were- figured we were easy touchs. The third is the only one who doesn't take the extras we give her for granted or as a sign she can slack off but rather as an indication that we are happy with her current level of work. We are very happy to have found her and were always surprised by the two previous employee's who reacted in the exact opposite way to what we had intended when we gave the gifts and bonuses!

  7. #15
    Sage is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Pokfulam
    Posts
    100
    Aussiegal, why yes. How strange. Her laziness and absent-mindedness started after I increased her salary. I decided to increase her salary after three months of hiring her as I was happy with her. But then, things went downhill from there... particularly in the loan department.

    Yes, I get the part about ensuring that we wouldn't fire her. Which is why I gave her only a month's salary. She wanted about HKD10,000. Once she's repaid her current loan, I have no doubt that she'd be expecting another loan. In my helper's case, I think it's just pure bad fiscal management. She has the latest iPod and a very snazzy cellphone so, I don't think she's in dire straits where money is concerned. I think she just doesn't plan for emergencies and/or impulse purchases.

  8. #16
    Shenzhennifer is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Tsuen Wan
    Posts
    1,288
    Quote Originally Posted by Portia View Post
    It depends on how much money. I have given advances on salary of a few thousand to most of my helpers, but my current helper needed to borrow $35K to repay a loan. We said no as she was new and we weren't sure whether she would be sticking around long enough for us to get repayment by instalments from her monthly salary if we repaid the loan for her.
    That`s funny, nearly her whole year`s salary - that`s like asking our boss at home for a loan of a half million dollars.

Page 2 of 3 FirstFirst 123 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. so many formulas - which is the best & value for money?
    By Tracey Nicole in forum Feeding Baby
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 09-08-2008, 10:45 PM
  2. Helper as a guarantor of her friend's loan
    By val23 in forum Helper Forums
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 09-08-2008, 10:30 AM
  3. Helper smoke, steal and loan money!
    By Yan in forum Helper Forums
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 01-07-2008, 10:54 AM
  4. help !!!!Maid ask for money
    By cybabe in forum Helper Forums
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 10-29-2007, 09:57 AM
  5. Transferring Money from U.S. to HK
    By NewMover in forum Everything Else
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 07-27-2005, 08:09 AM
Scroll to top