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Terminating helper

  1. #9
    Paddles is offline Registered User
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    May 2007
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    Mushi - all you need to do is give a letter to your helper stating the date of the termination and the reason why and that you have paid her all money owing and either a ticket back to the phillippines or the money for a ticket and get her to sign, you then need to send this to the director of immigration within 7-14 days I think. I took a photocopy of my helper's HKID too just in case I needed it later on.

    Both my helpers were philipina - the second one was a recommendation from the helper of a good friend who knew my circumstances. I have 5 month old twins and was turned down by a lot of people I interviewed as they thought the work would be too hard! I think you just have to trust your instincts and don't be afraid to ask them to come back and spend half a day with you, cook you something, spend time with the children, do some cleaning etc. My new helper came round a couple of times before I signed the contract and never minded - she said the decision was important to her too as she has to spend 2 years with us. Also, the second time I've gone for someone with alot of experience - she knows how to shop in a market, can speak a little cantonese, is mature and responsible. In total I must have interviewed over 15 people and I got really fed up with it, but I ended up with someone great. As you have a helper you don't have to rush the decision, take your time to find the right one.

    I was afraid of making the same mistake twice too, but i think you learn from your mistakes and you know what does and doesn't work in your family better. Be confident of yourself.

    I used to take my girls out most days just to get away from my helper, now I take my helper with me when we go out :o)

  2. #10
    Hughsiford is offline Registered User
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    Donkey--

    We are looking for a helper. Could you PM me with more details? Thanks.

  3. #11
    mushi's Avatar
    mushi is offline Registered User
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    gosh paddles. this is so very true....i sometimes take both my kids and get out of the house just to be away from her....i often thought abotu it but never fully acknowledged it till now...i guess i did not want to tell myself what a fool i was to still continue with the same helper.......but u r right this time i have time and will be in no hurry to hire a second one....this time i do not plan to interview so many of them....i just will wait till the right reference comes thru....it would really help if u ladies could also pls. keep a watch out for me....appreciate it.....thanks so very much agaion

  4. #12
    crystal88 is offline Registered User
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    Mushi,

    Just read your post today and i have to make my comment. Our helpers are THE SAME!!! Mine is 46 yrs old so we concluded that she doesn't like to take care of kids anymore, my boy becomes a cry boy now, every morning he says "bye bye" to her the moment he sees her. He cries practically everytime she asked him to take a bathe, change clothes, eat, etc.......I even have to tell her to please talk to my kid if she's feeding him as it's important for his development.

    I now end up bringing my boy to playroom morning and afternoon, i also cook our own food now as i don't trust her cooking, one time she made an orange juice with the skin on! Worst of all - she answers me back instead of apologizing if she commits mistake. I can't bear with that for 2 years.

    The difference with us is, after 1 1/2 months, i have decided to look for another one, like the other mom, i have asked the chosen one to come on a Sunday, so she can play with my son, i have already signed the contract and just waiting for visa. Then, give her termination letter and packed her things the same day. I initially thought of giving her one month notice so she can find another job, and for me to save the one month salary, but reading and asking around, better to get rid of her the same day.

    The lesson i've learned with this helper:
    1. do not get directly from Philippines, i want the helper to be interviewed personally rather than over the phone. In this case, i won't be shocked on how she looks, i would know her personality better. Mine doesn't smile too.
    2. do not get somebody older than me as they think they know more.
    3. not more than 30 years old so has the energy to play with my boy.
    4. don't expect too much, i used to want somebody good in cleaning, cooking, kids, etc...but superwoman doesn't exist. I've realized my priority now is someone great with kid, someone i can rely and trust when it comes to my boy. The rest, i can do it and bear with it.

    Good luck - to both of us for the new one.

  5. #13
    sherwes is offline Registered User
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    My advice for finding a helper is don't worry too much about things like cooking and cleaning. You can always teach those things. Focus on the innate qualities of the potential helper - do they have a ready smile, do they seem positive in their answers to your questions, how do they interact with your child/children, do they seem to have a happy disposition, do they demonstrate common sense?

    I focused on these qualities and I am really lucky to have a great helper. She is a pretty bad cook (good thing I like take away food!) but she is very kind, gentle and cheerful with my little boy and he just adores her.

    Of course, once you've found someone you like speak to at least one of her previous employers to get a reference.

    I couldn't put up with a helper who didn't smile or interact nicely with my son.

    Goodluck finding a great helper.

  6. #14
    mushi's Avatar
    mushi is offline Registered User
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    thanks rani, now i am just waiting for the 'right' one to come by.

  7. #15
    mushi's Avatar
    mushi is offline Registered User
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    crystal, sherwes, where did u find your helpers from? u r ight- other chores don;t matter its just the kids that i want to be taken care of really well....thanks for yr suggestions.

  8. #16
    sherwes is offline Registered User
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    Hi Mushi, I found mine via an ad on the geoexpat site. I also spoke to two of her past employers who gave her excellent references.

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