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Crying it out

  1. #113
    putput is offline Registered User
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    Hi milkmonster,

    Thx for your response. I'm still struggling with the 2nd nap and don't know where I'm going wrong. Southside852 and Mushi have been stars and given me hope but after a week of trying to get the afternoon nap sorted I caved in and rocked my daughter. Needless to say, this morning's nap,as a result, did not go to plan and I have a horrible feeling I've foolishly put myself and my now v.confused daughter back to square one. She just cries all the way through her 2nd nap and can go on crying for hours.

  2. #114
    mushi's Avatar
    mushi is offline Registered User
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    putput, can u pls. tell us your entire day's schedule....since both milkmonster and i have 10 month olds maybe we can help a little more.....MM, i do not want to feed him at 6.00 am since when i feed him at 7.00 he is very hungry for breakfast by 8.30 and if i give him that earlier too it will disrupt my whole day;s schedule which works perfect as of now....i am going to watch him for a few days and see if he gets cranky every morning...if not then i am ok with 6.00 am.,

  3. #115
    MilkMonster is offline Registered User
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    yes putput, please share your schedule so we can have more information and can compare 'notes'.

    if you ignore everything and just ask yourself what you think it going on with your daughter, what does your gut tell you?

    mushi, i think your son is hungry!! maybe that is why he is waking up? especially if he is really hungry at the 7am meal. my son wakes up, but never starving. he can wait and doesn't cry for meals anymore. my elder son was like that too. have you tried increasing solids during the day, or adding a more filling snack? (just an idea) that was always my first action if either of them woke up earlier - that they didn't get enough to eat the day before. that or he couls be having growth spurt?

  4. #116
    MilkMonster is offline Registered User
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    putput, just had a thought, do you think your daughter, since she has been crying so much in the crib, thinks the crib is a bad place? i remember reading somewhere, forgot which author, that she would climb into the crib and lay with the baby to show her it was a safe place and there was a thread on geobaby before about a mom who made the crib a safe/fun place and her baby no longer cried.

  5. #117
    MilkMonster is offline Registered User
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    haha sorry, keep thinking of things to tell you!!

    ok so for my 9mth old, we always give him water before his naps. now he takes it as a signal or cue that it's almost nap time and will often yawn, close his eyes while drinking his water. do you think it would help your daughter to have something comforting, like sucking on a pacifier (if you offer) or blanket (my son does this after i put him into the crib) just a few minutes of calming before you put her down? or have you tried this and it doesn't work?

  6. #118
    putput is offline Registered User
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    Thank you for being so supportive!

    Ok, so here goes:

    6.10: Awake
    6.20: BM
    6.35: Go out, plays etc
    7.30: Breakfast
    8.30-8.50: Start of first nap (Thank you, Southside and Mushi!)
    9.15-9.30 (depending on start of nap): Awake
    10.00: morning snack
    11.30: Lunch
    12.00: Showing signs of tiredness.

    Right, now here's where it's going wrong! Doesn't matter what time I put her down at this point she will cry solid for the whole nap time if I leave the room or fiddle, cry, play with teddy when I stay in the room. She's also really clingy and sad (!) most of the day although today I rocked her both times (stupid I know but I just caved in as mentioned in my previous post) and she has been her old, happy self again.

    I then end up having to rock her at some point (around 3.00) because I know she needs to sleep and she's starting to fall apart. Put her down to self soothe though and off she goes again crying.

    6.00: Bath
    6:15: BM
    6.45: Self soothes to sleep

    She may wake once or twice max, if at all, at night but she self soothes and is back asleep max after 20 mins.

  7. #119
    MilkMonster is offline Registered User
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    putput, what does baby do between morning snack and lunch?
    what about between lunch and showing signs of tired?

    have you tried doing exactly the same sequence you do in the morning, in the afternoon? something like this maybe?

    9.15-9.30: Awake
    10.00: BM/snack
    1030: Go out, plays etc
    1130: Lunch
    12: Start of 2nd nap

    I have this theory that babies need to be both physically and mentally stimulated enough in order to sleep well. I.e. if they just do a lot of tummy time, but no social interaction or vice versa, they lay there frustrated that they didn't get enough. Some kids need more than others. I find reading a book, or me just talking lots seems to tire out my baby if he's finished with tummy time and the exersaucer. Haha when he looks away and stops trying to make eye contact, i know he's done. I'm in no way saying you're not playing with your baby enough!! Just putting some ideas out there.

    what does everyone else think?

  8. #120
    putput is offline Registered User
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    Thx for your suggestions, milkmonster. I tried to work out if it is a fear of her cot that's causing the problem but it definitely isn't that as I put her in there during a 'non nap' time and she was totally relaxed. In terms of cues, she knows she's going down for a nap as as soon as I take her into her room after her routine she starts rubbing her eyes and getting ready to go to sleep. She just doesn't want to do it out of my arms! Then she's usually at playtown between the morning nap to afternoon nap so she's getting enough stimulation and then I do the wind down so she's not over-stimulated. Feed wise she has breakfast around 7.30; BM at 10.00; lunch around 11.30 although I've sometimes had to give it after her sleep if I see that she's tired early. I've tried different variations on her timings for the afternoon nap but still can't seem to get a time where she'll go down easily.

    I'm at a loss as to where I'm going wrong!!!

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