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View Poll Results: Are you generally happy with your helper(s)?

Voters
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  • Yes

    39 66.10%
  • No

    20 33.90%
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Are you generally happy with your helper(s)?

  1. #17
    shuchisingh is offline Registered User
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    Sep 2008
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    just one more addition.. we like ours too.

  2. #18
    HK2008 is offline Registered User
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    Wow...I'm truly surprised so far by the result...I was initially betting on 50-50, or 60(happy)-40...This is getting very encouraging indeed...

  3. #19
    putput is offline Registered User
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    I have the same issues as wanfamily apart from the fact that i'm not going back to work. My helper is goodhearted but lacks common sense; has fun with my daughter but her lack of common sense means she'll offer my daughter something on a saturday that was cooked on monday, for example; is extremely trustworthy in the sense that i believe she wouldn't steal but she does eat some of my food out of curiosity; humble enough to listen but too distracted to take it in!

    I've been in two minds for a while about whether or not to keep her. I'm worried about getting someone bad and also, feel sorry for her in case she doesn't get another job. My husband is adamant that he wants a replacement as he is fed up of her mistakes. I get annoyed too but feel bad letting her go, especially as i know she's fond of my daughter!

  4. #20
    AndreaY is offline Registered User
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    Quote Originally Posted by putput View Post
    I have the same issues as wanfamily apart from the fact that i'm not going back to work. My helper is goodhearted but lacks common sense; has fun with my daughter but her lack of common sense means she'll offer my daughter something on a saturday that was cooked on monday, for example; is extremely trustworthy in the sense that i believe she wouldn't steal but she does eat some of my food out of curiosity; humble enough to listen but too distracted to take it in!

    I've been in two minds for a while about whether or not to keep her. I'm worried about getting someone bad and also, feel sorry for her in case she doesn't get another job. My husband is adamant that he wants a replacement as he is fed up of her mistakes. I get annoyed too but feel bad letting her go, especially as i know she's fond of my daughter!
    Sometimes it's not a case of not having common sense but what they are used to. A lot of helpers do not like wasting food, since their standand of living at home may mean they have to save up everything. If she smelled or tasted it and it did not seem to be off to her, she may think it's ok to feed to a child. We tend to have higher food hygiene standards. Obviously, this does not make it "right", but if it's an issue that is important to you, just explain to her the dangers of offering such foods to you/your child and tell her it's extremely important for her to follow your wishes on the matter.

    I don't know what other mistakes she has made, but with our helpers, I find that mistakes often stem from the fact that either previous employer instructed them wrong or they simply have not been told it's wrong and not been told the right way. I normally physically demonstrate the correct way and tell them why it's done this way, give them a little while to correct their bad habits. It is only when my instructions are ignored further down the line that I tell them off about it.

  5. #21
    HK2008 is offline Registered User
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    what makes up a good helper to me

    Quote Originally Posted by wanfamily View Post
    I'm actually v interested reading this thread. I'm on my first helper.(new to all this) We hired her because she seems very honest, has good attitude and seems genuinely caring about our children. Negative side: her cooking ability is poor. (Trying to train her up at the moment and she is trying - but she's having difficulty saying goodbye to all the oil and salt!), she is very forgetful and lacks common sense sometimes. I'm going back to work on a few months and I'm going through the 'ahhh - what to do' phase..Children are the priority, so it it better to ignore the odd frustration with less important things rather than risk getting someone who is less caring about the kids..? I'm intererested to what makes up the 'perfect helper' and how easy they are to come by. My rational at the moment is that you're not going to get a mixture of Mary Poppins and Gordon Ramsey willing to work for a helper's wage????!
    I can see some helpers seem to belong to the in-between category---not bad enough to be terminated; yet much to be desired/improved. As I mentioned rather excitedly in another post, the following are what my helper makes me very happy with her:

    1. she has very high standard towards her work, either cleaning, or cooking, or looking after my children; and she herself finds what needs to be cleaned/taken care of;
    2. she also plans/prioritises her time to fit in to our routines; everything around the household is well taken care of, yet we don't feel the least bit of her intruding on our privacy;
    3. she cooks genuinely restaurant quality foods; but she still studies in her spare time different cookbooks to improve the variety of cuisines; honestly we haven't dined out once since she joined us two and half weeks ago. As Carang once said, it's like dinning out everyday anyway with a good helper---you don't need to cook(the restaurant quality food), nor you need to clean up!
    4. she's so skilled at looking after my children: she follows my DD around in the playground to ensure her safety and encourage her to try out new equipments; she cooks and serves the right amount and right variety of foods to both of my kids---it's a combination of meat and veggies...
    5. she's honest and grateful---she told me that she should not be entitled to paid statutory holidays within the first three months; when I said to her we will pay, she said 'why Mam? You are too nice to me. I'm very happy working for you already. You don't need to pay. I'm not entitled to that...
    6. more importantly, we chat to each other a lot. She talks to me about her family problems, seeking my opinions if she cannot resolve something by herself.

    I don't want to sound like I'm over glorifying her, but looks like I really cannot help it...I'd like to say my helper is perfect, but I'd also learned from some ladies here that one can never be too careful...

  6. #22
    aussiegal is offline Registered User
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    We love our helper but it took us three tries to get it right.

    I won't go into why we love her, the usual reasons (makes life a little easier) but I thought I'd share a story a friend told me.

    A friend of hers had the same helper for approx 18 years, right from when the first child was born. They loved her and considered her part of the family. Took her on many holidays abroad, trusted her implicitly and looked after her well. In return the helper did a great job. Loved the children, was a great cook, great cleaner etc. When it was time for her to go back to the Phillipines (no need for a helper once all the children were in their teens) the helper asked if she could cook a cake and take it back with her to remind her of all the cakes she'd cooked for the children over the years. Apparently she used to make beautiful, complicated cakes. The employer thought that was so sweet and said of course she could.

    When it was time to leave the employer drove the helper to the airport to say goodbye. On the way the helper started having a breakdown saying she'd left the cake at home and they had to go back and get it. The employer said they didn't have time and there was no way she was going all the way back home for a cake. The helper would just have to make one when she got home. After all, she knew the recipe.

    The helper was beside herself. Really getting upset, crying etc. But the employer wouldn't budge. She left her at the airport, said goodbye and drove home.

    That night the family sat down to dinner and remembered they had a cake to eat for dessert. After a few bites they discovered that the cake was not all it had seemed. The helper had hidden all the wife's jewellery in the cake!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Imagine that, after 18 years of trusting someone!

  7. #23
    Buckeroo is offline Registered User
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    Hi aussiegal, I'd heard the same story, too --5 years ago! I remember it because a well-meaning colleague told it to me as a "warning" when I first mentioned that we would need to hire full-time help. I wonder how much of that is urban legend, though...

  8. #24
    aussiegal is offline Registered User
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    Yeah I heard that it happened quite awhile ago. I'm sure it's probably both an urban legend and true story! I've heard lots of stories of jewellery, expensive items etc going missing so it would be quite possible that this has actually happened at some point in time. It's just a really clever way of doing it!

    I always try and remind myself that no matter how much I love my helper she does come from a different world to mine with different opportunities and that I should take nothing for given.

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