What time does your husband get home?
- 06-19-2009, 06:11 PM #17Registered User
- Join Date
- Jul 2008
- Tsuen Wan
It`s really great (and not so great) that a lot of you ladies are in the same boat, of varying degrees. It`s definitely less lonely:)
I`m trying to think of ways to get him spend more time together so it`s good to see how different people are doing different things.
To throw more into my mix, my husband is Japanese and works for a Japanese company - I`m sure you know, but the Japanese are famous for their hard work ethic (mostly translated as `long hours`) and also a lack of care for family life. For the most part, however, he is at work and not out carousing with colleagues - just the odd dinner/drinks with customers and short business trips once or twice a month. Also it`s apparently not possible for him to work from home at all since recently the company changed their computer network so he cannot send emails from their server unless he is in the office.
I like Smiles`idea of going to meet her husband for lunch - very doable for us since he`s only three metro stops away, so I think I`ll try to do that.
I`m a little reluctant to alter the sleeping schedule of our son, who is just 5 months old, still pretty young and can`t really stay away very long and gets up super early each morning. Maybe when he`s older. Plus, it`s nice once the baby goes to bed so I can start dinner and clean up a bit - and get a bit of time to myself:)
Anyway, it`s nice to hear I`m not alone here. I guess I should be glad because if we lived in Japan he wouldn`t come home til 11pm or later!
- 06-19-2009, 07:14 PM #18Registered User
- Join Date
- Apr 2007
Since coming to HK my husband frequently works til midnight - 2am. its ridiculous. But he has a team of people in NY and India that he needs to manage and communicate with on a daily basis and so has late night conf calls every night of the week.
When i saw that this was going to be the 'norm' we had a big chat and i said that i would rather leave HK than have him see so little of the family.
Instead he has taken the steps to 'put us in his diary'. He is home at 5.30pm every tues and thurs irrespective of what is happening in the office. He spends a couple of hours with the kids and does the bath, story bed. We do our best to eat at the table as a family these nights. At 8pm his conference calls start and he will generally work at home til midnight or later.
Its not ideal but 2 nights a week is better than none and i'm so proud of him for making the decision to do it and actually sticking to it!!
he is the talk of the office when we have social functions with his colleagues. his boss is forever telling me what an inspiration he is and how he too wants to start seeing his family more than weekends etc. interestingly though my husband is still the only one in the office who sees his kids during the week!
its definitely lonely for me during the week but to a large extent i'm used to it - on the rare occasion he comes home before 10pm on another night it cramps my style a bit!
thank god for geobaby and facebook!!
- 06-19-2009, 10:48 PM #19Registered User
- Join Date
- Jun 2009
- Hong KOng
I'm so glad that I read this thread -- thanks to the OP for starting the discussion!
My husband leaves home about 7:30am and comes home at varied times. About half of the days he comes back by 7:30pm, but then he needs to continue working from home till 11:00pm. The other half of the days he comes back 8:00pm to 8:30pm and don't need to work any more. And once or twice a month he travels for 2 to 3 days each time. I know this is not bad at all by Hong Kong standard, and it would have worked out ok if it were only the two of us. However, with a 1 year old baby who goes to bed by 8:30pm, it's like a battle for me everyday from 6:00pm to 9:00pm to get everything done (feeding dinner to baby, cooking dinner for hubby and me, eating dinner with hubby (if he comes back early), bathing baby and putting him to bed, eating dinner with hubby (if he comes back late)) in a seamless order so that 1) baby's schedule does not get messed up, 2) hubby and I get to eat dinner together, and 3) hubby can spend some time (30 min at most) with baby if possible.
I myself have not gone back to work since baby was born, because I just cannot imagine what our family life is going to look like if I do. My work requires long and irregular hours, I could get stuck in the office any evening or weekend, and I would need to travel quite often. In the current economic climate, hubby and I have had numerous talks about me going back to work so that we have more financial security. However, each time I balked at the thoughts of leaving our poor baby in the hands of a helper all the time and not being able to see his parents till the weekend (and even then I might not be around). Plus we have no extended family here, so what's going to happen if, say, baby gets sick while both hubby and I are travelling? These thoughts really horrified me whenever I consider going back to work.
Guess there is no real way around it as this is Hong Kong. But still very glad to be able to vent here!
- 06-19-2009, 11:14 PM #20
thank you ladies. you have made me realise how lucky i really am to be in the situation that we are, having hubby work from home. there's no way he ever wants to work a "proper job" again!
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