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I have a dead marriage with a 2.5 years boy, I don't know what to do.

  1. #17
    geomum is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Hong Kong

    Stephanie it does not essentially mean a wife loves her husband if she wants him to go to bed with her at the same time. It may however mean she is a bit controlling. What if on some nights the husband wants to watch soccer or hang out with buddies?
    Secondly your husband cannot be held entirely responsible for lack of intimacy between you two, you maybe equally to blame. Could it be that because he is not getting any emotional or physical support from you (Since your son was born) that he is looking for it elsewhere? By saying that I am not in any way justifying his actions but just want you to do some soul searching yourself. What efforts have you put in to keep your marriage alive??

    PS: Ladies please don't read between the lines here. I am just suggesting some possibilities.

    Last edited by geomum; 07-09-2009 at 07:50 PM.

  2. #18
    carang's Avatar
    carang is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Sai Kung

    it takes two to tango, or not as the case may be. geomum could very easily be right.

    i think there are some of us that have a difficult time realising that you cannot replace your husband's role with your child. it is very easy to sometimes neglect the husband in favour of the child. this could cause your husband to feel just that... neglected. he may go off and find someone who doesn't make him feel that way.

    i do not condone this, but i can understand it. instead of looking elsewhere, hubby should be talking to wifey about it. and wifey should be listening and not dismissing hubby's protests...

    (not to say this is what is in fact happening...)

  3. #19
    jaz1311 is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Aug 2008

    Hi Stephanie

    i was a single mother. Its hard but not impossible.

    My ex-husdand cheated on me and I never think twice about leaving, my daughter was 6 yrs old then. To make matter worse, my ex did not give me any maintenance and even emptied our joint account. In the end I have to start from stratch all over again. It was really hard but my girl told me she was happier being with me alone rather than having a father who always sneaks out in the middle of the night. My girl is 19 now and all these years my ex have never visited her at all. She is now a happy & lively young lady.

    I re-marry again 2 years ago and now I have a 8 months old boy.

    i have also sent you a pm.

    All the best

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