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Does your baby cling to you a lot?

  1. #1
    sorchului is offline Registered User
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    Does your baby cling to you a lot?

    I am a working mum but I only work in the mornings. When I go home in the afternoons, my little one will start clinging to me. Well, I am very happy to be with her, we play, talk, dance and eat. However, if I put her on her play mat or the chair, she will get bored after 10 mintues and wants me to carry her. I only get to rest and do my own things when she takes a nap.

    As she is getting heavier (6 months, about 15 lbs) and sleeping less, I find it tiring to entertain her non stop and I am running out of ideas what to play with her. I try to bring her out as much as I could but the weather is so hot and it's very polluted ouside.

    Any solutions?


  2. #2
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    carang is offline Registered User
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    actually, i agree that it is hot, but for pollution, it has been clearer lately than it has for the past year or so.

    as for running out of ideas...babies don't get bored doing the same thing over and over again. repetition is good for a baby, it helps them learn. it does get boring for the parents, though.

    i can read my children the same book every hour for days on end and they will still want it again.

    do you take your little on on everyday errands? to the supermarket, bank, post office? if not, why not? you shouldn't have to entertain her constantly. just be there. lie down on the floor beside her.

    remember, she does fine when you are not home in the morning. she is clinging to you because she missed you.

    my kids still come running and jump on me, then cling to me when i get home from work and they are 4 & 2 years old. it's normal. they want to spend time with me. i dread the day that my return home goes unnoticed by them.


  3. #3
    Shenzhennifer is offline Registered User
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    Sorluchai - I think we have the same baby -same age too! Except I don`t work and he`s pretty much like that all the time. When I lay him down on the mat (the times he doesn`t start crying and raise his arms), he pretty much just looks at me expectantly, like `what are we going to do now?` I know I have created this behaviour by constantly being by his side, entertaining and playing with him. I try to stand back a bit and watch him play, but he just looks at me. I am the play thing.
    As Carang said, babies love repetition. We have certain things we do at certain(ish) times and he loves them. We do jolly jumper for 10-15 min before a lunch. After that it`s 10 minutes of Peekaboo with a big blanket, which he just looooves. In the morning I always do little exercise sessions - either practice standing/walking, or `1-2-3 sit up(pull him up to sitting), 1-2-3 Stand up, 1-2-3 sit down, 1-2-3, lie down. I do this a few times - it tires him out working all those muscles. When he gets really fussy or tired and it`s not naptime yet, I will carry him(seated position) around the apartment for a tour, looking in the various rooms, checking himself out in the mirrors. Then of course there`s always books. Always from mid afternoon onwards we go out - to the mall, errands, doc appt, meet a friend, etc.
    But I know what you mean - I also wonder what other people are doing with their babies, especially the ones with dependent ones. Like you, I have to wait til he naps to make my lunch or go on the internet or clean or something. And his naps are very short. I agree, it`s tiring.


  4. #4
    loveask is offline Registered User
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    i think every baby has different temperments. my first was very independent and would play on his own and was never clingy... but my second is the complete opposite and wants to be carried ALL THE TIME...

    why don't u try taking your baby out for a walk in the stroller? if it is hot, just go into a mall. she might just enjoy the motion and being on the move. or try and arrange many playdates so that you are still indoors and your baby might enjoy the presence of other babies... though they won't be able to play together just yet!

    let us know how it goes.


  5. #5
    sorchului is offline Registered User
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    Thanks for all your great ideas. I think the best thing for us to do is to go out because mummy loves shopping and there is a lot to see for my baby. The only diffuculty is that the building I live in is not on a street level, I have to either go down the driveway which is quite steep or by the staircase. Also I have a heavy stoller which needs 2 persons to handle. I have been using a baby carrier but she is getting heavy...

    I like the exercise sessions, I will try to do it more often. Playdates is also a good idea. I know a few friends with babies who live quite close to me but seems that the mummies are always busy with something else.....

    Is there anyone who lives in Wan Chai /Happy Valley district?


  6. #6
    W2BMOM is offline Registered User
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    I'm a stay-at-home mom with a 19 months old boy and he is a very clingy child eventhough I bring him to 3 playgroups a week and regular outings to the playground, mall etc. He will cling to me at home, at the playgroups and even when we go out. At home my helper and I would play with him but he will always end up looking for me and not just that, he wants me to carry him which I find more and more difficult as he is getting heavier now and I'm beginning to have knee pain most probably due to too carrying him for long periods of time. I also have Mother's wrists (pain in the wrists). Even during the night, he would wake up crying and wants to be carried and end up sleeping in the bed with me. Btw I breastfed him until he was 16 months.

    Even when we are out and about, he would sometimes walk for a while and he would want me to carry him. He doesn't like the stroller and we would always end up using it for our bags. He wouldn't want anyone else (not the helper or even daddy). It's really tough for me as I can't even use the toilet without him wailing outside. I'm always in a rush. A quiet and peaceful meal is a luxury to me coz' he will wanna sit on my lap. Also when I'm at the computer.

    I think that maybe I'm his only play mate which is why he behaves the way he does and I notice the more I play with him, the more he wants me. That also being the reason why he doesn't stick to dad much coz' my hubby is not a very hands on dad and he is not very good with kids. He's too quiet. I'm always the one clowning with him. Bringing him out more or even playing more with him will only make him more clingy in my opinion.

    My solution? Leave him with the helper and let him cry (sometimes until he vomits) while I do my things (usually just to take a shower or a toilet break) or let him cling on to me until he's had enough and heads towards his toys. Until then, there's really nothing I can do. My friend who has similar experience with her daughter told me to wait until he's about 4 or 5 before I can have my "freedom". Well, I certainly believe not all kids are like that maybe my son is just born with this character. I always tell myself to enjoy this moment instead of whining coz' once he grows out of this phase who knows I might miss these special bondings we share with each other. Meantime, it's really tiring but seeing his smile, I think it's worth it.


  7. #7
    sorchului is offline Registered User
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    What about watching TV? I let my little one watch a bit of 'Baby TV' on ATV World while I am getting ready for work. The program is about 2 hours long (8-10am Mon - Fri) but I only let her watch 20 minutes. She will sit on my bed with some cushions around her and I can see her from the mirror on my dressing table. I would also add my comments such as 'Look, it's Harry the bunny! See what he is doing today...'


  8. #8
    piper is offline Registered User
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    Hello my situation is a bit different but im curious if bubs will become too clingy bc my bubs is only 9 weeks...but bubs will fall asleep on me and when i try to put in the crib will wake in less than 5mins and cry. Wants to be held by me, and will fall asleep in my arms in less than 2mins. Am i creating a bad habit i will not be able to correct? Are they too young to be already spoiled?

    thanks,
    Piper


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