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recommending my helper

  1. #9
    HK2008 is offline Registered User
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    Quote Originally Posted by woodstock07 View Post
    For me, being honest and hardworking and willingness to learn are important. Other skills like housekeeping and babycare should be taught to the standard required by each individual employer.
    I beg to disagree. Being honest and hardworking and willingness to learn are the very basic things a good helper should possess. Other skills can be taught for sure if the employer has the time and is willing to put in the effort to train the helper to do things 'her (the emplyer's)' way...But for many people out there, an experienced helper becomes a real help instantly which is what we are after after all...unless someone wants to go through the pain of training from scratch for months to even a year...

    I believe what mushi had explained that she and the helper both adjusted and made changes afterwards and their relationship becomes pleasant enough that she now can confidently recommend her. However, I cannot help either but to point out one thing that Mushi had so frustratedly put it in her other thread: She is also quite negative in everything and honestly her entire outlook dampens my spirits since i have to spend the whole day with her....i have really tried my best to ask her her problems or any issues she may have with me....after this counselling she is a little better though looks forceful for a couple of days and then back to normal....

    I can tell you from experience this is rather an issue that no one can affort to ignore. My helper for instance, as I previously so ardently put it, does the best quality of work at everything. However, coming from a broken family coupled with personality issue, she doesn't smile or talk much at all. In fact all people I know of was surprised after seeing her how I could possibly be happy with her...Because I know first hand how Mushi had felt: her entire outlook dampens my spirits...Imagine yourself getting up in the morning and greeting your helper with a smile but were greeted back with a stern look, like you owed her money or something...Don't forget if you are not working, you have to face your helper day in and day out. Actually I had to make it my job to talk her out of her personal issues/struggles/emotional ups and downs, (thank God she has nobody waiting for her to send her money to), by giving her sound and soothing advice, or helping her set up her personal goals etc to motivate her...I used to be very confident at handling all sorts of relationships, but I have to admit this employer-helper relationship is one of the toughest that I had to deal with...hence it gives me more perspective as to understand how on earth other ladies could feel reluctant to hire a helper even when they do need the help.

    My 7-month continuous effort is finally paying off. My helper is ready to smile at me (only, not other people yet) a lot more. Of course she still does an excellent work, so I've absolutely no complaints otherwise.

  2. #10
    woodstock07 is offline Registered User
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    HK2008, like I said in my post. Those are what I look for in a helper. You are of course entitled to what you want from a helper. I relied on my own judgment during the interview to decide whether Pinky was the right helper for me.

    Mushi's reference was just one of the factors in my decision process and I also took into account what she had written in her previous thread.

    Anyway, I'm not sticking out for Pinky as she did not work for me in the end. I'm just vouching for the fact that Mushi's account of events in August did take place.
    Last edited by woodstock07; 10-03-2009 at 01:41 PM.

  3. #11
    honeybee is offline Registered User
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    When Mushi's recommendation says that her helper is 'excellent' with kids, I just can't help assuming that this helper who commented as 'excellent' with kids must be someone who shows affection to kids, willing to play or smile with them. Not someone who spent 8 months with kids and still fails to show any affection for kids or any kind of enthusiasm to work, to play with them or even to smile. Am I right??

  4. #12
    mushi's Avatar
    mushi is offline Registered User
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    thank you HK2008 and woodstock!!

  5. #13
    sorchului is offline Registered User
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    Quote Originally Posted by HK2008 View Post

    I can tell you from experience this is rather an issue that no one can affort to ignore. My helper for instance, as I previously so ardently put it, does the best quality of work at everything. However, coming from a broken family coupled with personality issue, she doesn't smile or talk much at all. In fact all people I know of was surprised after seeing her how I could possibly be happy with her...Because I know first hand how Mushi had felt: her entire outlook dampens my spirits...Imagine yourself getting up in the morning and greeting your helper with a smile but were greeted back with a stern look, like you owed her money or something...Don't forget if you are not working, you have to face your helper day in and day out. Actually I had to make it my job to talk her out of her personal issues/struggles/emotional ups and downs, (thank God she has nobody waiting for her to send her money to), by giving her sound and soothing advice, or helping her set up her personal goals etc to motivate her...I used to be very confident at handling all sorts of relationships, but I have to admit this employer-helper relationship is one of the toughest that I had to deal with...hence it gives me more perspective as to understand how on earth other ladies could feel reluctant to hire a helper even when they do need the help.

    My 7-month continuous effort is finally paying off. My helper is ready to smile at me (only, not other people yet) a lot more. Of course she still does an excellent work, so I've absolutely no complaints otherwise.
    HK2008: What you have done to your helper impresses me. I would like to know how did you talk her out of her personal problems and to motivate her etc.... My helper is a bit like yours (before), does not talk and smile much. However she does good work and takes care of everything at home very well. Thanks.

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