Is 8.5 months too old to try CIO?
- 12-04-2009, 11:53 AM #1Registered User
- Join Date
- Oct 2008
Is 8.5 months too old to try CIO?
From 3-6.5/7 months old, my son was a very good night time sleeper. We would feed him his last meal at night (BF plus top up bottle) and then put him in his crib whereby he would play by himself for a little bit with his toys and then fall asleep. However, about a month or two ago, he started disliking his crib. After his feed when we put him into his crib, he would cry uncontrollably. Each night night we put him down, he is clean, well fed, burped, etc., but yet he cries uncontrollably and gets really hot and sweaty so that I am forced to pick him up. So we put him in our bed while we do our own thing and eventually, in 5 or 10 minutes, he would fall asleep and we would put him back in the crib.
If he wakes up in the middle of the night, he would also cry pretty hard, but I would then go over, pick him up, cuddle him for a few minutes and when he had fallen back asleep, put him back down in his crib. But in the past few weeks, he has had none of that and absolutely will not go back into his crib. If he cries, we pick him up, hold him until he stops crying (usually less than a minute), rock him for a few minutes and then attempt to put him down again but the minute he is in the downward motion going back to the crib, he starts crying really loudly again. So we have resorted to bringing him into our bed and having him sleep with us. Theoretically I could put him in our bed for 5 minutes and then move him back over to his crib, but then I would risk him getting up again in the middle of the night and crying and sometimes, I'm just too tired at 1am to wait 5 minutes until he is fast asleep and move him over (both my husband and I work full time). Once he is in our bed, he sleeps fine until the morning - though in the morning, sometimes he wakes up earlier in our bed because there is not as much space for him to roll around.
So I am looking for suggestions on how I could get him to go back to sleeping peacefully in his own crib. We certainly don't want him to continue to sleep in our bed with us, but we really don't know what to do. And when he cries, he really CRIES uncontrollably and works himself up into a fit of sweat and tears!
Any helpful advice would be much much appreciated!!!
- 12-04-2009, 02:06 PM #2Registered User
- Join Date
- Dec 2008
our son was never a good sleeper and we did CIO around 8/9 months. I felt that our son was stronger then and would be able to handle it better. I am happy to say that it did indeed work for us and as a first time mom, I was stronger too knowing that he would eventually just fall asleep. It took about 4 nights. I just made sure - he wasn't teething, sick etc....they all cry uncontrollably when they want you and aren't getting you. personally, we never co-slept with our son because i felt it would just lead to one more thing I had to wean him out of - our list seemed to be growing rapidly. Our son is now 23 months and sleeps in a regular twin bed and we've gated the entrance to his room so in a way, his room is one big crib. Sleep training is even harder in a bed b/c they can just get up as they want to so we've doing CIO with the gate. I was getting up 10 times in one night before the gate. He now just gets up no more than twice a night and for no more than 5 minutes of crying, before returning to his bed to sleep. I used to be worried about CIO, but believe in it now. It's helped us with our sleep too as I would normally be a mess then next day from lack of it.
There are tons of posts on this website about CIO and everyone will have a different opinion. I would suggest, take what you can from each person and then apply it to your situations. Every child is different and every parent is too.
- 12-04-2009, 04:03 PM #3Registered User
- Join Date
- Jul 2008
- Tsuen Wan
I`m not a fan of CIO and haven`t actually done it, but as my baby got older, I would and still do sometimes just let him cry for a while.
My son also just went through a tough sleeping phase(at the same age as yours), naps too. I think for the most part he`s back on track though there are nights when he`s off again.
It sounds like your baby has had a taste of the good life and doesn`t want to let go. If you`re fine to let him sleep in your bed, then do it, but the longer you allow it, the harder it`s going to be to have him sleep in his own bed.
I did the breastfeeding thing, the bottle feeding, my husband walked him, and then out of frustration I let him cry for a while. Then out of my `tough love`, I finally decided to do the Baby Whisperer`s Pick up/Put down method. So basically, if your baby is fine (not sick, teething, not hot/cold/hungry/thirsty), you would pick him up when he starts crying. At your son`s age, as soon as he stops crying you would put him down. Then of course he cries and you basically repeat it over and over until he gets the picture that you`re not going to be doing anything more than putting him back down. Some babies it takes many times, so if you want to try it, I suggest to do it on the weekend when you can afford to lose a bit of sleep. Like CIO the next night is less and so on.
I was doing it for naps too, and it really worked. It`s not a nice thing to do and takes time and effort, but the end goal is what matters, plus you don`t have to ignore them - you`re there with them all the way.
- 12-04-2009, 04:08 PM #4
Our son went through a similar thing around the same age. Our once perfect sleeper seemed to hate his crib and cry until he was picked up. It was so bad and I was so exhausted I ended up sleeping with him in the spare double bed we had in his room for a few weeks. Just so we could all get some sleep. He was also teething and had a cold/ear infection so that contributed to the disturbed sleep. In the end we knew it couldn't go on so once he was healthy we started a very mild version of CIO and like southside852 it only took us 4 nights. I only let him cry for 5 minutes maximum before going in to comfort him, which at first was a pick up and cuddle but eventually got down to a rub on the back. Now if he wakes and cries its usually only for 1-2 minutes.
At 8-9 months babies can handle it especially if you don't let them cry for too long. If you decide to give it a go, maybe start it on a Friday so you can catch up with some sleep over the weekend.
How is he with his naps during the day?
- 12-04-2009, 04:11 PM #5Registered User
- Join Date
- Dec 2007
My 22 month old daughter is very bad at sleeping right from the very first day. But still i never tried CIO, neither did i wanted to. She cries inconsolobaly at night and as she is big now, its difficult carry her and pacify her, but she gets up because she gets frigtened. Have tried all other means - -like feeding her a little more in dinner, letting her play as much as she can so that she gets tired and sleeps well, but all in vain, Every night the same story - she gets scared and then she cries. So i just don't let her CIO, because she is not in a that state. Still looking for solutions to this poblem.
So before you try CIO method, make sure that the poor baby is ready to handle it.
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