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Trying for a boy - second bub

  1. #1
    chucolate is offline Registered User
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    Trying for a boy - second bub

    Hi all,

    I just gave birth to darling daughter in Oct 09', husband and I would like to go for a second bub. Now that we have a daughter, we'd like to try for a boy (actually I'd love to conceive twins!!) and I was wondering if moms out there could give me some heads up regarding conceiving and higher chances of conceiving a specific gender.

    I am still breastfeeding (exclusively pumping due to DD not able to latch on, still trying though!), and my period came last month - Jan 16 and lasted till 24th.
    Supposedly my period is due yesterday, 13 Feb. How should I calculate my ovulation day when I'm still breastfeeding? Is it accurate? How many cycles should I wait until we "try"? I heard that if conceived on ovulation day, it's more likely to be a boy?

    Husband and I both love kids (we want at least three), we don't want huge gaps between our children.

    Thank you!!

    Jackie

  2. #2
    aussie mum is offline Registered User
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    I have two boys. And am pregnant with my third. I have polycystic ovaries and irregular cycles So the only way I know I'm ovulating is using ovulation predictor kits ( the kind you wee on like a pregnancy test).
    If you have intercourse the day after the opk is positive you supposedly increase your chances of having a boy. No guarantees of course! Seems to work in my case.( not that it was our intention). The theory is that male sperm swim faster so will reach the egg first.
    If we decide to have a fourth we might try to swing the odds for a girl. That seems more difficult to me.

  3. #3
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    carang is offline Registered User
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    you can also check out "ovulation calendars" on google. they will highlight the optimum days for conceiving males & females.

    just curious.... your current baby is only 4 months old and now you are hoping for twins? you are a glutton for punishment! wow! that is a lot of children in diapers all at once...

    personally, my two are exactly 2 years apart and i find it to be a fantastic age difference.

    good luck!

  4. #4
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    nicolejoy is offline Registered User
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    I conceived twice while breastfeeding (first time I miscarried) - and neither time was planned. For me, my cycles were very irregular so there was no way to "know"... Some people have obvious signs, like the cervical mucous etc - but personally, I never knew. We were "trying" to conceive although more passively. I said that once my cycles were regular, I'd try ovulation kits - with my first, that's how we conceived after a year of trying. I guess that my first pregnancy made me more fertile or something though because the 2nd two times, it was much "easier" to fall pregnant... I wouldn't try an ovulation kit until you know that your cycle is semi regular though... and for breastfeeding mums, that sometimes takes over a year.

    I love the idea of kids being close together though and I wanted another one when mine was 4 months old (as soon as I was past the "irish twins" phase!!) - turns out my two will be 21 months apart.

    I have no advice as to how to get a boy... Some people say that you should do the baby dance on the "early" side of ovulation for a girl and on the "late" side of ovulation for a boy (I think it's that way around)... there are books out about that kind of thing. I don't think that anything is particularly accurate though. In the end, it's 50-50 chance...

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    chucolate is offline Registered User
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    thank you everyone, for the advices and experiences! It seems like the ovulation kits are the way to go, but I've heard they're quite pricey.
    I'd love to have three boys, but I guess it would be a nightmare once they grow up! haha!
    I enjoyed carrying my daughter and the delivery experience, she didn't give me a hard time... It took me 2 hours to dilate to 10cm and only 5 pushes to deliver her, apparently I am very fortunate given the fact that I am short and weight only 40kg when I conceived. It took my mother 20hours+ to delivery my sister!

    I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I am definitely in for the idea of closer age gap between the kids, they can play with each other and I can just get it over with pregnancies in one go, get busy one-off and focus on my career after 5 years or so... (ideally, that is).

    Looks like I should monitor my cycles before I "do" anything... Thank you again, moms! Although motherhood is tiring, frustrating, demanding and destroy our once sexy bod... It's all worth it in the end :)

  6. #6
    geomum is offline Registered User
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    It seems you are only thinking about what YOU want and not about your baby. Not all pregnancies are alike and no matter how much you try, your attention will be divided once you get pregnant and have a second. Physically, emotionally and financially a child is a life's work. Its not just ovulation kits that are expensive diapers, formula, doctors, nannies, education, sports activities etc etc are expensive too. Ultimately its your choice but I recommend you give it a few more months so as to understand motherhood and the challenges it brings, 4 months is hardly any time. A baby’s needs only increase as he/ she grows. Having dreams and fantasies is a great thing but successfully realizing them in a real life situation is not just hard but sometimes impossible.
    And to answer your initial question if you want lots of children what does it matter if the second one is a boy or the third or fourth? Why are you so gender biased?

  7. #7
    starbucks2 is offline Registered User
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    There is a book called something like Choosing the Sex of Your Baby (do a google search) which has theories on how to choose one gender over the other. If you follow their strategies they have pretty good percentage success rates.

    It is a topic that always has lots of different opinions but you are, of course, also free to have your own view.

  8. #8
    Shenzhennifer is offline Registered User
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    I just want to chime in here...
    When my baby was around 4-6 months, I also started daydreaming about another. Things were on track, it was such a cute age for him, somewhat of the honeymoon after the first few months of getting used to things.
    THEN little by little, things just got to be more and more work, and I stopped dreaming about a second, and started just wishing for more sleep:) Now my son is 13 months and man, I even get a bit daunted about what the next year will bring, what with his sudden walking, different eating habits, new independence, increased mess, more time spent taking him places to entertain him or keep him busy, etc etc. I am now starting to think again of having a second, but part of me still shudders. I hope I get myself, my marriage and my sleep all in order before a second one comes....
    But to answer your main question, I have never heard of being able to control the gender. Basically it`s 50-50, isn`t it? Some people seem predisposed to carrying one gender though.
    I think it takes a few cycles for your period to get back into order, after you start menstruating again. Most women start again when they decrease breastfeeding, such as when they go back to work, or when the baby starts solids. Breastfeeding also is apparently nature`s kind of birth control though far from fool-proof. If you really want to get pregnant, just start `doing it` with your husband and hope for the best.
    Good luck. Hope you have a helper. You will need one:)

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