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Missing the family...

  1. #1
    fingerscrossed is offline Registered User
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    Missing the family...

    Just venting.....

    I've been in HK for 15yrs now and when it comes to leaving my parents or them leaving me when they visit HK, I cry big time coz I still miss them a lot. I have a 2yr old now and its sad to see them say goodbye to him. I know it sounds insane but I just can't control it. I usually get over it within a few days but it drives me nuts.

    Actually, I have a strong urge to go home and be with them as I feel that the love and care they give me is what I need right now. Sometimes, the pressures of HK and the occasional strain it can put on a relationship makes me want to just go back to basics. BTW, husband is too attached to this place to just pack up and go.

    Dear oh dear....sigh

  2. #2
    carang's Avatar
    carang is offline Registered User
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    i understand COMPLETELY where you are coming from! i'm in exactly the same boat. been here 15 years, 2 kids now (3 &5) and i HATE that my kids don't really "know" their grandma.

    in the summer, she is moving to vancouver, which should cut our travel time by almost 1/2 and also the cost....i'm SOOOOO looking forward to that!

  3. #3
    Bumps Guest
    I empathize too..... it is hard being away from support and friendly faces .... and family in general. I miss Sunday lunches!

    I always cry when my mother catches her flight out of HK - I feel like such a baby - but it IS hard. It IS hard to let family into your life when then come over and it IS hard to let them out - when they go home.

    I have learned to really enjoy my time when my mom/ family come across...... this is because - I have always felt so bad and guilty when they go home when we have had a disagreement etc...... I do bite my tongue sometimes and in the long run - it is so much better for me mentally - and it is usually about something trivial.... I always think - "when will I see them again?" - and that makes me sooo sad. WHo knows?

    On the upside..... what DOES keep me sane is involving my family in my everyday life..... I take photos of bubs, new things around the home, the markets I go to - what I am cooking for tea - you name it - I love to take photos of MY LIFE and let them in....

    Take care

  4. #4
    Lisainhk is offline Registered User
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    I know what you mean! It's heaps hard being here and having family far away. I often get upset by it. Especially since money for us and my mum is scarce so we will probably see them once a year if we're lucky. I was hoping it would get easier but seeing as you have been here 15 years and are still feeling it then I guess it doesn't. Arrghh!!

  5. #5
    Lisainhk is offline Registered User
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    Oh but yes on a positive note, I also take lots of pics and send them by email very often as well. Helps mum and dad feel up to date with baby's progress. :) Thank God for the internet!! I can't imagine how much harder this would be without skype and emails! Other people have it much harder. :(

  6. #6
    Shenzhennifer is offline Registered User
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    After my mom came to visit here for 3 weeks in Jan, when she left I felt like she died. It was like I had the taste of the good life for a few weeks, and my son bonded with her immensely. I hate him not having any family here (plus it makes him EXTREMELY dependent on me and me only), and I hate my family not being able to witness him growing up and older. I`ve been out of Canada for the better part of 12 years now, but with a kid/family now, it is harder to be away (even though my husband is not Canadian).
    We`re planning to move (back) to Canada after 2 years, though a lot of it is because of the kind of life we want to give our son and any future child.
    It gets tedious after a while with all the skype/emailing pictures/blog, etc. Maintenance.

  7. #7
    fingerscrossed is offline Registered User
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    Thanks for the replies and its good to know I'm not the only 'sook' around here. Yes, Skype is wonderful! We log on a few times a week but after having them here for a few weeks and seeing them interact with my son and seeing him run to his grandparents is something else.

    I still wonder when I can actually move back to Sydney and have a house with a lawn and backyard. At times like these, I reckon I can survive without a maid, haha.

  8. #8
    freddiebiscuit is offline Registered User
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    fingerscrossed, I go through the same thing everytime I see my family once a year, and we've been in HK for 8 years. I start thinking about the emotional goodbyes even before I leave Hong Kong to go home, which drives me nuts and makes me feel so sad! My mom starts crying the week before we need to leave to come back to HK! My folks are getting older - 76 and 81 - and I always feel guilty about not living closer to them so they can get to know their grand children and vice versa. I didn't come to HK to spend the rest of my working life here, but feel we may be here for some time still.

    Every time I bring up the subject of moving at least closer to home, my husband says "we'll see". I really miss the support of my family, too. For example, hubby is away with work for two nights this week and I'm home alone with a 2 year old and 5 month old... Would have really liked to have the option of visiting the folks for these 2 nights and sharing the grand kids with them!

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