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Meals for helper

  1. #9
    Frenchy is offline Registered User
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    Get another helper, who knows how to cook, for her, for you, and for your kids.

    Edit : When we hired our helper, we made it clear from the beginning. She has a food allowance. She can use some products in our kitchen (like oil, spices etc...) to cook her food if she needs to. She will also make a bit more for her when she cooks or bakes (only once or twice a week as I like to cook). I've registered her to some cooking lessons as she is willing to learn more.

    We have a purse, and a notebook. If she does grocery shopping, everything is in the book with the tickets. She has an octopus card for the transportation dedicated to our family/son/shopping and she will refill it with the money from the purse.

    And : she is great for the cleaning and loves to play with my son !
    Last edited by Frenchy; 08-08-2010 at 11:50 AM.

  2. #10
    geomum is offline Registered User
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    You definitely need to sit with her and talk to her about the issues you have. If she says she can't change her ways and isn't willing to learn then go ahead and let her go. Like Frenchy said get another helper, who knows how to cook OR is willing to learn, for herself and for your family. Judging from what you are saying about her responses she seems to have serious attitude problems.
    Last edited by geomum; 08-08-2010 at 12:32 PM.

  3. #11
    ihave3cats is offline Registered User
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    Frenchy, u are really lucky with a helper whom u are agreeable with! Yes, geomum, after discussing with hubby, I will sit down with my helper tomorrow to tell her exactly what I am unhappy about. I will give her one more chance before I terminate her. I will be trying out the meal allowance too. Hopefully things will turn for the better.

    She is my 2nd helper since we first came.. The first one couldn't even speak English! I had to send her back after 3 days. I interviewed this currently one personally. She told me she took care of the household cos both employers were working.. Told me she cook, grocery shopped and cared for the 3 yr old girl. Seems like her information is not accurate!! :(

  4. #12
    TheQuasimother is offline Registered User
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    Quote Originally Posted by ihave3cats View Post
    told me she took care of the household cos both employers were working.. Told me she cook, grocery shopped and cared for the 3 yr old girl. Seems like her information is not accurate!! :(
    Didn't you check with her previous employer? Always conduct a reference check for helpers hired in HK! Or even the ones with overseas experience around the region would be able to give you a reference check. If you can't get one, then you know you shouldn't hire them.
    “If you want to get to the castle, you’ve got to swim the moat.” Richard Jenkins in Eat Pray Love

  5. #13
    Frenchy is offline Registered User
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    We are also "meeting" every 2 weeks to talk about what is going on in the house, what we are happy about and would be MORE happy about... she tells me how she would like to do some things, and we take some decisions.
    We are very honest to each others from the beginning, she never lied to me about what she was good at or not.
    What I did is to set a plan, what should be done and when, my children schedule, and what I was expecting from her (cooking once a week for the family, baking the snacks for my son, cleaning, baby sitting, errands), and it's working good. Maybe you could write down what you are expecting, and if she does not agree with it, then find someone else...

  6. #14
    ihave3cats is offline Registered User
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    TheQuasimother, the agency said that the previous employer provided her a recommendation letter so she didn't want to be disturb beyond that. U are so right! I should have insisted and call. I thought to myself, she worked in the previous employer's family for 3 years, if she had been so bad, they would not have renew her contracts after 2 yrs.. Apparently wrong thinking!!

    Frenchy, I tried to work on communicating with her but I always get the 'yes mdm' thing. Sometimes I will purposely ask a few times in different ways, she always reply 'yes mdm' even though it should be 'no mdm'.

    For her off days, she will leave our place at 6.30am and always comes back slightly after 9pm. (like today, 9.15pm!!!) these are the little things adding up making me unhappy... But I will address this tomorrow when I talk to her too.

  7. #15
    carang's Avatar
    carang is offline Registered User
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    sorry, but i must say that there is absolutely nothing wrong with her coming back after 9pm. the helper is entitled to 24 hours off and how she chooses to spend it is up to her. i do not agree with imposing curfews on grown women. HOWEVER, if she comes back drunk or high, then obviously that's a little different.

    i still think that you would be better to start fresh with a new helper rather than try to "fix" the current one.

  8. #16
    ihave3cats is offline Registered User
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    Carang, as per what u said, I should be giving thanks that she didn't come back at 6.29am? Every family has their expectation of what and how the helper should behave and do. We agreed before 9pm even before signing the contract. If this is so demeaning to a grown woman, she should not have started working for my family. I guess I would be more forgiving if she had been more useful around the house.

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