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Mealtime of a toddler - Need advice!!!

  1. #9
    carang's Avatar
    carang is offline Registered User
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    sorry, bumps, being inquisitive is great, but your child should now be starting to learn that there is a timea nd place for everything.

    a couple of suggestions:
    1) if he is telling you he's done. then he's done. don't offer him anything else for at least 3 hours. that way, he will associate sitting in the highchair with eating a meal. don't argue with him. don't chase him. follow his lead.
    2) do NOT offer anything else for 3 hours. then make it something substantial, fruit, a slice of toast etc.
    3) relax about it. he's getting a lot of attention from you over this. that may be what he's looking for! you are either getting cross with him or chasing him! instead, do the exact opposite. turn off the attention. let him go play, take the food away and do not make a big deal of it. do it for a week a nd see what his reaction is...
    4) whatever you decide to do, do it for a week, minimum. otherwise, neither of you can see how it's working.

    good luck!
    ps> it has NOTHING to do with having a boy or a girl.

  2. #10
    Bumps Guest
    Wow, Cara..... you sound like my MIL! Personally, as I have had anorexia throughout my life - I never EVER - make a big deal about meal times. Yes, there is a time and place for everything. But don't stress each other silly.

  3. #11
    carang's Avatar
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    my whole point is that running around after a child trying to get them to eat IS making a big deal of it.

    all i'm saying is: put the child into the highchair and feed/give food. when they CHILD has decided they've had enough, then STOP. don't force them. don't run around after them. don't do silly dances to distract them. don't play with them. simply let them go. they've given you the signal that they're done, so LISTEN to it. HOWEVER, they DO need to learn that there is a time for meals and a time for playing. SO, if they are showing signs of hunger later on (around 3 hours later) THEN let them eat.

    i don't see how that is making a big deal?

    i've just come back from a dentist's appt. my son has always been a grazer, so i'm not new to the problems of feeding kids. due to genetics and my son's pre-disposition to grazing, he has 9 cavities. all in spite of the fact that he's brushed religiously since he was about 14 months old. a BIG part of the problem is that he grazes... his body is always producing the acid needed to break down the food and so his teeth never get a chance to "neutralise" the acid.

    i really don't see how you interpretted what i said to mean "make a big deal of it"...as a matter of fact, i said explicitly the opposite!

    " ...turn off the attention. let him go play, take the food away and do not make a big deal of it."

  4. #12
    Bumps Guest
    Cara, think we are trying to explain similar advice, but in a different manner? I did not interpret what you said as 'make a big deal out of it'. I said "I personally don't make a big deal of meal time."

  5. #13
    carang's Avatar
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    ok, sorry...

  6. #14
    jvn
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    Bumps, I think it might have been the reference to your MIL - being likened to one is usually interpreted as a negative thing ;-)

  7. #15
    carang's Avatar
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    gor, if anyone EVER said i'm like my MIL, i'd die...only problem? secretly, i know i AM! argh!

    shhhhhh! don't tell anyone! it's a secret!

  8. #16
    lesliefu is offline Registered User
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    sounds like your baby is healthy and fine so I won't worry if he were to miss a meal or two here and there during the process of training him to sit down and eat rather than being chased around. it will take a lot of consistency on your part, but keep at it, it will work! my daughter ONLY eats sitting down - high chair, normal chair, stool whatever, as long as she is sitting down and not moving. once she moves she doesn't get any food - she knows...threw fits for the LONGEST time, but as long as everyone dealing with her is consistent and uses the same method, it will work! keep at it! :)

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