Forums  •  Classifieds  •  Events  •  Directory

 
Page 2 of 6 FirstFirst 1234 ... LastLast

Random people touching my little one (rant)

  1. #9
    Gataloca's Avatar
    Gataloca is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    TKO
    Posts
    643
    And didn't know that westerners children are part of the attractions at Disneyland and Ocean Park! You guys should be able to enter to the parks for free!!!! hahah... in fact, the parks should pay you guys!

  2. #10
    carang's Avatar
    carang is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Sai Kung
    Posts
    6,259
    i, too, had to get used to it. still do and mine are 3.5 & 5.5. from a very young age, when people would ask if they could take a photo, i ALWAYS asked my kids if they wanted their photo taken. if they said no, then too bad. if they said yes, then ok.

    as for touching hands etc. if you are really that worried about it, then just make sure you take wipes with you. it's going to happen, why get upset over it?

    just say to the woman who won't let go, 'sorry, it's very difficult/ uncomfortable holding the baby in the sling when you've got her hand.' and remove yourself from the situation.

  3. #11
    howardcoombs is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Happy Valley
    Posts
    552
    Quote Originally Posted by AmyH View Post
    My biggest issue with it now is that my son is 6. He has been learing a lot about stranger danger etc and it gets confusing for him as we have two completely different reactions depending where we are! In hong kong if strangers come up and start talking to him, and taking pictures we don't really react any more but in the UK if a stranger started taking pictures of my children I would be calling the police.
    Personally, I continually encourage my kids to talk to strangers as I dont believe in StrangerDanger. I'm a big believer in FreeRange and do my utmost to encourage my kids to be independent and not fearful. Be cautious and wise, but dont be fearful. Talking, taking pictures and playing are OK. Leaving the area, getting into cars is a big NoNo!

    I am quite curious though why you have chosen to give your child such conflicting messages. Whats wrong with a UK citizen talking and/or taking pictures of your child while a Chinese one is perfectly alright?

    Quote Originally Posted by AmyH View Post
    When we are out and people come up to talk to my son, he doesnt answer as he can be very shy and I always say "say hello" etc and he turns to me and says "but they are strangers mum and you told me never to talk to strangers". It is very confusing trying to explain that in HK it is fine but in UK it is not!
    Its no wonder he is confused :-( Kids really do need reinforcement and consistent messages.

    In our family, it doesnt matter if its White, Chinese, Indian, Black - man or woman. Be polite, smile, say hello and talk and play but stay in the area and stay in public. Whether we are in Canada, UK, Hong Kong or China; the same consistent rules apply.

    HC

  4. #12
    1stimemum is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    bel air
    Posts
    164
    i belong to the camp that firmly believes its not right to let them touch my baby. I have no idea who they are, where their hands have been and I dont want to encourage the notion that anyone can pick my child up and later on , even walk away. The little one is going to get very confusing messages about boundaries.

    but i know every parent is different and we all make our own personal decisions.

  5. #13
    howardcoombs is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Happy Valley
    Posts
    552
    Quote Originally Posted by 1stimemum View Post
    i belong to the camp that firmly believes its not right to let them touch my baby.
    but i know every parent is different and we all make our own personal decisions.
    As you are in Hong Kong and the norm here is a bit different, prepare yourself for a lot of stress and anguish for your personal decision. Whether you like it or not, people *will* come up and touch your baby/toddler and in general they wont ask for permission. You will then get upset and stressed and in turn, most likely you will make the other person feel bad in the process when all they wanted to do was to show some love and affection to a beautiful child.

    It would be much better for everyone (including you) if you just get used to the idea as this is the norm here.

    Quote Originally Posted by 1stimemum View Post
    I have no idea who they are, where their hands have been and I dont want to encourage the notion that anyone can pick my child up and later on , even walk away. The little one is going to get very confusing messages about boundaries.
    Suggestion to avoid confusion:
    Talk, play, take photos == OK
    Try to leave the area, away from mummy's eyes == Its NOT OK; Kick, yell, scream!

    HC

  6. #14
    carang's Avatar
    carang is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Sai Kung
    Posts
    6,259
    HC, agree completely!

  7. #15
    AmyH is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Gold Coast
    Posts
    380
    HC as you have pointed out, it is the norm in Hong Kong so we have tried to adjust to this as we live here and expect it to happen but it certainly is not the norm in the UK or Ireland for a stranger to just come up and start taking pics of your children and I personally have never ever felt the need to take pictures of other people's children.
    When he is with us, we have no issues with him talking to strangers but when he is alone he is not allowed to.

  8. #16
    City Jammer is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Taikoo Shing
    Posts
    80
    I know what everyone means here :) Yes, I got that a lot too while travelling with my little girl since she was 2 months old and she is now 22 months. There was one incident when a lady jumped out of nowhere while I was pushing her stroller into the MTR station. She had strange makeup on, like a little child who is trying on makeup for the first time. She ran up to us, laughed really loud, grab my little girl and planted a big **** on her cheek, leaving a deep red lipstick stain! I was stunned for a couple of seconds and then the lady ran off. Other than that, my little girl waves goodbye to everyone and says it in a very loud voice whenever we leave a shop or a cafe :) I figure it's quite harmless. Just bring a pack of Messy Times wet tissues with you whenever you go out with your little one :)

Page 2 of 6 FirstFirst 1234 ... LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Maternity Leave - Rant
    By sau yi mum in forum Everything Else
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 06-11-2010, 01:36 PM
  2. Rant : Unwanted advice and opinions
    By wasabibunny in forum Hong Kong Pregnancy Forum
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 08-27-2007, 12:12 PM
  3. Touching
    By Mellie in forum Parenting - Toddlers and Preschoolers
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 11-10-2006, 08:11 PM
  4. Toddler touching his genital
    By mslksy in forum Parenting - Toddlers and Preschoolers
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 09-05-2006, 09:58 AM
  5. rant of a cranky pregnant lady....
    By carang in forum Hong Kong Pregnancy Forum
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 08-21-2006, 09:00 AM
Scroll to top