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Random people touching my little one (rant)

  1. #25
    carang's Avatar
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    i agree, geomum, but really you are not going to change teh culture and really will be too stressed taking your child out if you let it get to you.

    my mum used to say, you have to choose your battles. for me, this is not a battle i'm willing to fight. it is so much easier to just carry wet wipes and continue on my way. even though my kids are older, we still don't leave the house without a supply of wet wipes. i mean, even playing at the playground is "dirty". instead of making myself crazy about it, we just clean them up afterwards.

  2. #26
    AmyH is offline Registered User
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    can I ask what may seem a silly question please..... Why do people do it?(touch babies and take pictures of them I mean). Is there some sort of chinese tradition around it? I am genuinely interested as I have never encountered it until we came here. Is it seen as good luck or something?

  3. #27
    carang's Avatar
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    i don't know... perhaps it is that because of the 1 child policy, children are not as abundant as they are here...i know when i go on holiday, often it is the PEOPLE that i find the most interesting. i would never take a photo wihtout permission though...

    as for touching babies... i know i have to REALLY hold myself back. i LOVE babies! it was only after reading some threads on here similar to this one that i found out that some women do not appreciate it. i now ALWAYS ask before i touch. i just think that it doesn't occur to them that you may view them as dirty/unhygenic etc. just as you can't understand why THEY do it, i think they can't understand why you might not like it....

  4. #28
    AmyH is offline Registered User
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    I have gotten used to it now and am lucky that my daughter is quite placid and does not make strange when it happens. A friend brought her daughter to visit us from UK last year and we went to Disneyland and she just cried a lot when people came up to her and spent a lot of time hiding behind her mother!

    I have never found the hygiene thing an issue though as I am a firm believer in wipes and once she was crawling and then putting her hands in her mouth, a person touching her was not going to do any more harm than that!

    The thing that bothers me most is when people video and take pics without asking. Also, when I am in a hurry to get somewhere and people block the buggy to chat to her so I cannot get past!

  5. #29
    geomum is offline Registered User
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    Its because they are fascinated by blue/green or big eyes, blonde/red or curly hair because it different. Because they want to get amazed over and over again that non chinese babies/ toddlers are much bigger. Also because they cherish baby boys more than girls, so if you have a son you get more attention. Some may find these reasons hard to digest but they are true.

  6. #30
    carang's Avatar
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    well, my kids are mixed and i've found that my girl gets as much attention as my son every got...

  7. #31
    jvn
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    Although actually, The Boy is average size and some of his Asian friends are bigger than him but still everyone always says "Oh, so big" when they see him, I think its just something people say, maybe because they expect white kids to be bigger... or cos they're looking at me when they say it ;-)

    Agree though, an Asian baby in a predominantly white country will get a lot more attention and vice versa - it's exotic :-) and generally I think there's a culture in Asia a) of taking more photos generally, I mean you see tour groups taking photos of what, to my mind are the strangest things, and b) different cultures have different ideas about comfortable personal space and touching. I would think it's true that they wouldn't imagine why other people would be uncomfortable with it - I don't mind as long as The Boy doesn't.

  8. #32
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    Totally agree with jvn. And Chinese babies are not smaller anymore. My baby is bigger than some westerner babies of the same age. Also I have a friend (Chinese also) whose 3 1/2 months old baby is already wearing clothes for 6 months old babies. But probably they find the westerners babies special: white skin, big eyes, rosy cheeks, blond hair... Just like porcelain dolls.
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