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Advice needed - helper refuses to house-sit

  1. #9
    Gemma is offline Registered User
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    I think you are being extremely nice to your helper, to the point where if you start bargaining and negotiating with her what she could manage and what she can't, and in my opinion, I think house sitting is totally reasonable and should be one of her duties that does not require explicit documentation, my concern is she will continue to push and test you wrt other duties when you get back.

    I am very reasonable to helpers but to me, it sounds like she just wants a whole week (or however long) off and do whatever. That's not to mention you are still responsible for her even though you are away, as she works under you on the contract. Even if fear of sleeping alone is a problem, I don't see why she can't look after the house during the day.

  2. #10
    Biggie is offline Registered User
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    Do you live in an apt or house? My last helper was a bit nervous housesitting when we used to live in a house and it's very quiet around at night. She felt much better with our dog around. But I agree that she is a grown up and should be capable of staying at home by herself. I believe you don't have to put down housesitting as duty as she is legally required to live in your house whether or not you are away.
    Another thing to consider is given you don't know her so well yet, you might want to lock up all valuables and ask neighbor to pop in for random checks or call in. Perhaps also ask for her relatives' number "in case" you cant reach her
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  3. #11
    lesliefu is offline Registered User
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    seems very funny to me that she would even ask and that you would even consider allowing her to stay with her relative. isn't that why you hired a helper, to look after your house when you need help...considering she is still on probation, the fear of being alone should not be something on her mind, but keeping her job! it's bad timing that you haven't seen her relative, or else the relative could possibly stay over at your place instead...anyhow, perhaps i'm being too mean, but i'd give her an ultimatum (seriously - it's part of her job!) and if she can't handle it hire someone else.

  4. #12
    elle is offline Registered User
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    I have checked with immigration on this and in her time off she can sleep at a friend or relative's place. However, we only inquired about weekend nights and whether she was permitted by the conditions of her stay to spend a night away here and there. Our concern was along the lines of could we require her to stay at our place on her time off, which she is by law for a continuous 24 hour period once a week. Fortunately it hasn't been an issue as she gets days off in lieu of Sunday if we need her to take care of house and dog while we travel and has been happy with the arrangement for years now.
    Quote Originally Posted by Obiwan View Post

    It is required that she lives at your address, regardless of whether you are home. Should you allow her to live out, that would be something for the 2 of you to agree on, but I don't think she had the right to refuse.
    ....
    Last edited by elle; 09-10-2011 at 11:39 PM.

  5. #13
    Gracey is offline Registered User
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    Afraid of the dark?
    Sage -- that is the silliest thing I've ever heard.
    Helpers say they want to be treated as respected employees (and adults). But many of them act like children -- and their employers are left looking after them. And I say this as someone who is very pro-workers rights.
    But this is a seriously lame excuse.
    Could you imagine your boss sending you on a business trip, and your saying that you were afraid of sleeping alone in a hotel room?
    Never mind her personal issues -- dark or not, house or flat, lonely or not. And never mind whether it's written in detail in her contract -- my helper's contract doesn't details every tiny thing she does.
    She's a grown-up, and keeping house is her job.
    thanka2, carang and satay sue like this.

  6. #14
    thanka2 is offline Registered User
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gracey View Post
    Afraid of the dark?
    Sage -- that is the silliest thing I've ever heard.
    Helpers say they want to be treated as respected employees (and adults). But many of them act like children -- and their employers are left looking after them. And I say this as someone who is very pro-workers rights.
    But this is a seriously lame excuse.
    Could you imagine your boss sending you on a business trip, and your saying that you were afraid of sleeping alone in a hotel room?
    Never mind her personal issues -- dark or not, house or flat, lonely or not. And never mind whether it's written in detail in her contract -- my helper's contract doesn't details every tiny thing she does.
    She's a grown-up, and keeping house is her job.
    Exactly. I agree.
    “Many women have described their experiences of childbirth as being associated with a
    spiritual uplifting, the power of which they have never previously been aware …
    To such a woman childbirth is a monument of joy within her memory.
    She turns to it in thought to seek again an ecstasy which passed too soon.”

    ~ Grantly Dick-Read (Childbirth Without Fear)

    Mother of Two
    JMW, boy, born November 29, 2007, 9:43 pm, USA
    MJW, girl, born March 17, 2011, 4:14 pm, HK

  7. #15
    Zoska is offline Registered User
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    Gracey i think you said it perfectly!

  8. #16
    Luzz's Avatar
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    This is already an obvious sign of a manipulative employee regardless of the type.
    You might want to consider changing one or there will endless of unreasonable negotiation going on.

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