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Helper and the baby

  1. #25
    Gracey is offline Registered User
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    Sep 2009
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    Hong Kong
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    Update: It's been 2-3 weeks since I started this thread.

    The helper is playing with the baby on the playmat more, once I showed her that playing with the baby could actually be fun and rewarding. I also told her that the baby would sleep better if she played first, since she would get tired.

    The helper still rocks the baby to sleep too much during the day -- but as I'm seeing improvement, I'm going to be patient. She still coddles, but less. And she seems to be trying to fight the instinct to rush over to the baby at every whimper.

    She also seems to be getting that me, my husband, even the grandparents, are encouraging her to just let the baby be sometimes. But, boy. She needs LOTS of repetition.

    It's up and down. I was away this morning and when I came home she told me, all proud, that she made the baby sleep for a LONG TIME through mid-day. And I gently explained to her again that, while naps were good, we didn't want too much long, deep daytime sleep, because it disrupts nighttime sleep.

    Several weeks ago, I was upset when the helper said "no" to my request that the baby sleep less during the day. So far, she's shown much better attitude.

    This is a tough one because it's not a black and white instruction. I don't have my baby on some sort of black and white Gina Ford-type schedule, so I'm asking the helper to use judgement. Does the baby SEEM tired? Does she seem awake? Is she just whimpering a bit for attention, or is she seriously crying and needs to be picked up?

    Tomorrow, I'm going to type up a simply instruction sheet that says "Eat. Play. Sleep."
    Also, "Daytime: Windows open. Lights on. Music on. Light swaddle or no swaddle."
    Early this evening, before dinner, I found the baby tightly swaddled, in a dark silent room. My husband said gently to her, "boy, should we have the baby sleeping like that a few hours before bedtime?" (I only start that routine at 9pm.)

    When I'm alone with Baby, we generally do 3 naps a day -- quick one in the morning, longer one at midday, quick one in the afternoon /evening. Then I try to keep her awake a bit before her 9 pm bedtime. Does that sound right to you guys?

  2. #26
    Newbie_hk is offline Registered User
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    Sounds just about right. My routine is almost the same as yours although I start my bedtime routine at 7.

    Funny how you wrote your update at 4 am. Feeding I presume? I was up at the same time too, feeding as well!

  3. #27
    Gracey is offline Registered User
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    Hi Newbie -- How old is your little one?
    Yes, I was up after her feeding. I know I should go right back to sleep after she does, but once I'm up, I'm usually wide awake. Also, I don't do her feedings in the bedroom. I bring her out to the living room. By the time I'm done feeding, burping, and coaxing her back to sleep, I'm awake and pretty bored. So I go online.

    We start her day at 7 or 8 am. She feeds about every 3-4 hours until evening, when she gets a bit hungrier.
    She has her last feed around 9 pm. That's when the lights dim, the music goes off, she's put in her sleeping bag and walked around.
    She usually falls asleep at 10 pm and lasts till 3 or 4 am, which makes me REALLY happy. This is a new development. Then she sleeps again from 4/5 am to 7 am.

  4. #28
    Gracey is offline Registered User
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    This morning, we kept the baby awake for an hour after her feed. We played with her, gave her a bath, changed her, played with her some more, until she showed signs of fatigue. Then we settled her for just a few minutes before leaving her alone in bed -- and after a little grumbling, she fell asleep for her morning nap.
    Of course, this is with me watching the helper like a hawk.
    OK, the helper still swaddled her and forgot about the music. But she seems to be learning....

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