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Anyone else going crazy from baby sleep issues...

  1. #9
    catan is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    hong kong

    Lali07-- I loved that article. Thank you for sharing!

  2. #10
    cq000 is offline Registered User
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    Jun 2011
    Hong Kong
    Quote Originally Posted by meimeid View Post
    My son was the same at 3 months, only slept when rocked, carried or nursed and it drove me a bit crazy as well. I tried CIO, and some other methods (eg PUPD), but it didn't work at that age. But now, 4 months later he naps entirely by himself for longer. Guess some babies will sleep by themselves when they are ready. The easiest thing to do is just accept and wait until he's ready.
    After he was born and he was full on the "hundred-day cry," everyone say he would get better by a month ... then when a month came others said he would cry less at three months (the official end of the "fourth trimester") ... now the forum moms say definitely four months is a lot better ... haha. I guess there will always be something to look forward to. Later there will be crawling and all that etc. But I do believe 4-month-old baby sleeps a lot better by themselves. I think my son slept through the night not only because I didn't give him a rewarding nighttime response (i.e. nursing), but also he was developmentally ready to sleep through the night ... so yea. But I've gone too far now to go back to swinging and nursing him to sleep, everyday I see a bit of improvement (but its so incremental that it hardly feels like progress)

    Indeed as charade says "this too shall pass"

    I'm really scared to have another kid now ... I love my son and I accept him for whatever kind of baby he is (grumpy), but its still tough.

  3. #11
    meimeid is offline Registered User
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    Mar 2011
    Hong Kong, TST
    Quote Originally Posted by cq000 View Post
    ... now the forum moms say definitely four months is a lot better ... haha. I guess there will always be something to look forward to. Later there will be crawling and all that etc. But I do believe 4-month-old baby sleeps a lot better by themselves.
    Actually, with my son I meant four months LATER, so at seven months. At four months he still couldn't nap by himself. Just managing expectations... ;) But it does get better!

  4. #12
    evgreen is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Tai Tam

    I went thru the same thing. From what I see on this thread, it's very normal! I did try some form of sleep training at 3.5 months old because my baby would refuse naps when put down or only nap for 15 minutes unless I was holding and rocking her in a sling. I can tell you though that the sling and baby wearing really saved my sanity for the first 3 months. I did the pick up put down technique by Tracy Hogg at 3.5 months and although there is some crying involved, you never let baby to CIO alone. It does get better. I did try some CIO at around 6 months because the night wakings were too much to handle. A month later, my baby is sleeping much better now although still night feeding once or twice a night, she able to fall asleep much better now and stay asleep. Sleep training is definitely a work in progress...

    Last edited by evgreen; 04-30-2012 at 12:29 PM.

  5. #13
    Gracey is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Hong Kong

    We hired a great night nanny, and she said that 5-6 months was ideal for sleep training, not younger.
    Similarly, a professional nurse at Annerley said she wouldn't let a baby cry it out before 5-6 months.
    Are you sure he's not too little?
    Very few children sleep through at 3 months. And all babies those first 3 months just need reassurance.
    Dr. Spock, the famous pediatrician, said that letting babies too young cry it out can have the opposite effect. If they feel secure, they will sleep more easily. If they cry out and nobody gets them, they learn to be nervous and distrustful -- and they associated the bed with the bad memory of being alone and scared.
    We did sleep train our baby, but at 5-6 months.

  6. #14
    eesmithy is offline Registered User
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    Jul 2011
    Hong kong

    Hi, glad to hear we're not alone. My son turned 3 months a few weeks ago and we've definitely entered a new phase where he can no longer just fall asleep at the drop of a hat and cries when tired. When he gets over tired we get some intense purple faced crying, but now I am learning to read the signs, these episodes are getting easier to avoid. Apparently 3 yawns max and head to bed!

    During the day we are on a 3-hr feeding cycle so my son has 3/4 naps in between, some only 45 mins others 1.5hrs.

    As with everything, each baby is different. Since entering this new phase I was finding that the only way I could get my son off to sleep without tears was on the boob, not necessarily feeding but comforting until he fell asleep on me, then i would transfer him to his basket. This was very time consuming and frankly getting a bit sore. Equally restrictive as I would be the only one able to get him to bed. I reluctantly tried a dummy and he didn't take it, but he's happy to try and self sooth with his hands.

    A few days ago i started letting him CIO gently to see what would happen. I found that as long as I'm sure he is tired i can put him down and he may cry for a few minutes but after that it tends to slow down and he starts to relax and fall asleep. He doesn't seem particularly distressed, all babies cry, even if i were to put him down asleep he would sometimes wake himself and cry, all babies experience that at every stage. The key is to not leave them crying in distress. This seems to be working for us now so we will continue and while for some babies 5-6 months may be appropriate for starting to CIO others can cope sooner and I would guess if you miss the window to introduce it when appropriate they may get used to other bad habits and struggle to adapt to CIO later on. Surely you know your baby best and will intuitively know how he/she is coping. Btw, my son also sleep through the night. 7-7 with a dream feed at 10pm.

  7. #15
    Lamlo is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Dec 2011

    I am!!

    This is the first time I ever responded to a post because I usually end up digging up those from like 2 years ago and there's no point in responding because those babies Should have grown out of those nasty sleep problems by now!! So yes, me too am going crazy with my LO's sleep problem, ESP those naps. I seriously worry that this issue will drive me off the edge and into depression. He's almost 4 mths now and He sleeps
    "ok" at night -- in bed at 8:30, cry for about 30 min (we started training last week with the check & console method), then wake up around 2 or 3 to feed (actually I dont know if he really really needs to eat or just wanna get up and Bf) then wake up at 6 or 7. But during the day it's a battle. Morning nap is ok If I sleep with him otherwise it would only last 30 min. All other naps involve crying and hour-long rocking. One time I was so fed up I just let him to cry and he actually managed to not nap for like 8 hours!!! So then I tried to carry him in carrier in afternoon just to get him ti sleep. But I'm exhausted from walking around with him because I wanna nap too!! I have no life :(

    I too thought things will get better. All those hopes ppl gave me about 1 mth, 100 days, 4 mths, 6 mths... They all keep saying -- when hes older it will get better... Grr... I dont know If I can believe it.

    Sorry I'm not really saying anything helpful here. Just wanted to vent coz on a night like tonight when LO is sound asleep im hit by insomnia, and then battling a cold that I must have caught from those middle -of - the-night feeding while the A/C was on and the fan blasting because Bf makes me sweat!! Anyway... I just wanna say -- ur not alone.
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  8. #16
    MommyTo3 is offline Registered User
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    Feb 2008

    I have a slightly different opinion, suggestions and experience. I followed Healthy Sleep Habits Happy Child as he was our pediatrician. He's a very nice, down to earth guy, and very much in line with my own thoughts about sleeping. I did have them cry it out, fairly early on, not hours of course, but especially with my twins (and another 2 yo in the house) I couldn't physically attend all children at the same time.

    My general belief (and experience), like Weissbluth, is that overtired children have less problems falling and staying asleep. Many children are going to bed overtired, whether it's at nap time or night time. It's hard to settle when you're really tired, or fall back to sleep once you wake up. My oldest was going to bed at 7 pm around 8 weeks old and would sleep 10 hours straight, then her napping regressed and I put her down at 6 pm at 3 months (his advice) and she slept 13 hours straight, and napping improved slightly as well. My twins went to bed at 6 pm at 8 weeks because I had to take care of my then 2 yo afterwards (who was going to bed at 7 pm at that point). I wasn't in Hong Kong, had no helper and was on my own. So the twins would wake up around midnight at first and then again at around 5 am, go back to sleep til 7 am. At around 2 (3-4 for my son) months, they dropped the midnight one, and the basically slept 11 hours straight. They were fairly good nappers too. Once getting older, I slightly pushed their bed time back, but 5 years later, we're still only a little past 7 pm.

    Early bedtimes are not always great as my husband didn't get to see them much but they were very well rested, good sleepers and we all benefit from that. Now years later, I can basically say I never had any major sleep issues, except the rare night mare. They go to bed early (currently between 7-8 pm, they are in Primary), they are well rested. And that's all that matters in the end.

    By putting them to bed drowsy but not too tired, they fall asleep more easily. At first there may have been little crying but nothing excessive and within weeks they were soothing themselves to sleep (at 3-4 months). It's like Weissbluth says, you have to choose the right moment. Go too early ... they won't sleep, wait too long, and it will be more of a struggle too. It's not easy, but with practice you will find out what works for your child.

    Not saying it's for everybody, but my children were / are perfect examples and it's something else to consider. I do believe you can sleep train early on, and most children could be very good sleepers if we would just offer them enough sleep.

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