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in despair. . . .

  1. #17
    thanka2 is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Quote Originally Posted by MommyTo3 View Post
    You can do it by yourself. Millions of women do and so can you. Of course we like our helpers and the work they take out of our hands, but in the end, if you don't have one, it's not going to change the world. The house may not be as tidy, you may need to order take out once in a while, but it's not the end of the world. I am pretty sure you can find somebody to help you clean your house in the meantime for a few hours if that's what you need right now. My children were born in the States, family is in Europe. I had 3 children under the age of 3 (including new born twins) and very little help (cleaning and 8 hours babysitting a week) and a husband working 12 hours a day. I survived, and so will you ;). Hope you find a better helper soon This one clearly has to go.
    Will say that I believed the same thing but not all moms are the same. It really did change my world for the positive to have a helper--made me more of a functioning mom. So, while I do applaud the women who do it without one--even the ones who have several pre-school and younger children running around at home....I would never go back to being without a helper when my kids are little. If I hadn't gotten help with my kids it's a scary thought of what state our family would be in right now. So thankful for the luxury to employ a helper because I live in HK and totally not ashamed about that fact at all. I'm from the States as well and all of my American friends who are SAHM doing everything solo suffer from some very serious difficulties--among them depression and lower immune function--and their marriages are super tough. No thanks.
    baby-ethan likes this.
    “Many women have described their experiences of childbirth as being associated with a
    spiritual uplifting, the power of which they have never previously been aware …
    To such a woman childbirth is a monument of joy within her memory.
    She turns to it in thought to seek again an ecstasy which passed too soon.”

    ~ Grantly Dick-Read (Childbirth Without Fear)

    Mother of Two
    JMW, boy, born November 29, 2007, 9:43 pm, USA
    MJW, girl, born March 17, 2011, 4:14 pm, HK

  2. #18
    baby-ethan is offline Registered User
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    update --- She's gone and I'm very happy. Like a load has been taken off my shoulders . (even though HAVING a helper is supposed to do that!!)
    thanks for the encouragements "you can do it!" , made me stress less ... and I have arranged for part time help for housework. In the long run I think I agree with thanka2. I once thought I can be a supermum, taking care of the kid(s) and household all alone but must admit I'm physically and mentally over-tired already and I only have 1 baby!

    Now need to find a helper who really can take the load off my shoulders ... wish me luck ! :)
    thanka2 likes this.

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