HELP NEEDED!! Sleeping INDEPENDENTLY!!
- 02-22-2008, 05:11 AM #1Registered User
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HELP NEEDED!! Sleeping INDEPENDENTLY!!
My paediatrician suggested that it's time to teach my 9 month old son to fall asleep independently. My 9 month old needs me to hold him or carry him plus walking around the house to rock him fall asleep! He only have short naps during the day if being carried, otherwise he'd just cry and cry continuously and wont fall asleep. I usually hold him after a few mins he starts crying. People told me if baby doesnt sleep well, they wont eat much. My 9 month old is a bit underweight since 2 months old. I dont know what to do.
Any experiences on teaching babies to fall asleep. Please HELP!!
- 02-22-2008, 06:44 AM #2Registered User
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I highly recommend the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. My 8 months ds is now falling asleep on his own. He used to be carried and rocked and couldn't put him down when he was asleep until he was 6 months old.
Let me know if u need help.Last edited by rani; 02-22-2008 at 07:36 AM.
- 02-22-2008, 09:50 AM #3Registered User
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i would say DO what's best for you and your little one and DON'T do anything just because the doc has told you. you probably won't be able to change your baby's sleeping habits in a short while, so first figure out what's best for yourself and the baby and then slowly start trying out something new. RELAX and don't let yourself be put under pressure by people who only know your situation from occasional visits! good luck!
- 02-22-2008, 10:33 AM #4Registered User
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i agree with mosmom. Parents are the ones who know their child best. You should try to figure out why he needs you to carry him to sleep --- is it the feeling of security, getting used to the warm cosy hug from you etc etc...
You may try to start putting him down beside you when he's very sleepy, but not yet fallen asleep, such that he's aware that you're no longer carrying him. Sing or talk softly to him to let him know you're there until he falls asleep. Hope it works!!
- 02-22-2008, 11:20 PM #5Registered User
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Thanks for all the feedback! I'm gonna get the book to see what other methods I could try. In the meantime, will continue carrying him and try what anpanbaby suggested to see if that works with my 9 month old.
- 02-23-2008, 12:46 PM #6Registered User
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Hi - I had the same problems as you - my baby would not go to sleep on his own but at 9 months i was pregnant again and he is a big boy 12kg so I had to stop the carrying. Still I bought the Healthy Sleep habits Healthy child and even though i tried crying it out once or twice it did not seem the way to go for us so the book was not great for us. That said I beleive strongly that once the baby learns to fall to sleep on their own they will sleep longer at night and the day. it just depends how you want to get them to that point. I did do some crying it out at night but I never left the room and always there to reassure him (sometimes I think this made it worse but at least he knew i was there)- this was to put him to bed and later I would not pick him up in the night (the first night took two hours of crying at 2am as he was used to being picked up but never happened after that). I basically would lie him back down when he stands up but keep telling him time to sleep etcc etc. He has the hang of it now a(15months) and is pretty good night and day although I have to say walking really helped with day sleeping as much more tired. I still stay in the room when he goes to sleep and often have to keep a hand on his back but he mostly sleeps through so I am happy with that. but it is different for everyone - i'm sure if i was stronger I could leave the room and he would learn but happy for now and I think they get better as they get older. he always goes to sleep by himself and knows he is in the cot so that is the main thing - I do think personality plays a part. oh and when he is sick it changes again - he needs to be picked up and sleep in arms etc but i think we all like more comfort when sick and he always gets back on trackas soon as he is well again. sorry long post I just know how hard it is - let me know if you need more info - i bought lots of books - I liked baby whisperer solving all your problems but I think it just depends on your point of view and what you are happy with.
- 02-23-2008, 01:00 PM #7Registered User
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Another Book you might like to try is No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley
http://www.shopinhk.com/the-no-cry-s...-t-pr-290.html
La Leche League’s review of the book
This book provides a gentle approach to sleep training for parents who believe it necessary to modify baby's sleep habits without resorting to the cry-it-out methods. It offers easy-to-use charts to see where you are in the beginning, what your plan for getting your baby to sleep will be, and measuring your progress. The ideas presented are common sense solutions to a problem that is seen as monumental for many new mothers. LLL does not agree with the cautions against letting baby fall asleep at the breast or holding a sleeping baby or child.
Elizabeth was interviewed for a podcast at the LLLI conference in 2005 and this is available at http://www.llli.org/podcasts.html?m=0,0,8#nocry
Best wishes,
SARAHLa Leche League Leader
www.lllhk.org
- 02-23-2008, 04:20 PM #8Registered User
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I agree with Rach and others who have said that it really is a personality thing and you really have to see what works best for you and your baby. My mom and sisters said that I should just let my son cry it out (at 6mos back then) and boy could he cry - it was painful, for me and for him. And when he did sleep, it wasn't a deep sleep - I think he was fretting over the fact that I might not be around. So I decided that we would continue our routine of singing and rocking him to sleep in our arms before we put him down into bed. Tiring for us but it meant that he would actually fall into a much more deeper sleep. After awhile we started cutting down on the amount of singing and rocking, slowly helping him to adjust to not relying on those motions to get to sleep.
Since he turned one (he's now 21mos), nap time consists of me lying down beside him or sitting beside him (if he's really tired already), and just gently reminding him that he needs to sleep and telling him he had a busy morning, etc. and he's good with that. For nighttime, he sleeps on a cot beside our bed but he's been pretty good at sleeping on his own for quite awhile now though he does ask to hold my hand every once in awhile.
Good luck and don't be too hard on yourself or your son if he doesn't get around to sleeping independently immediately - it will take time.
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