parental nakedness around toddlers

[Koan]

This is such a cultural issue and personally, our family is not shy (and at the same time we have proper modesty) about our body parts.

I think modesty is a culturally loaded concept, and the qualifier 'proper' adds a whole other dimension to this as a cultural issue.

[0ze_Kid]

We too had this discussion recently and decided that it was OK for a little longer - I did however purchase a book called "Everyone's got a bottom" by Tess Rowley. Just to help explain differences in body and how to respect your own body (I thought best to do it as a story so I don't cause any permanent 'damage'). It is good, we have read it a couple of times. It also talks about siblings bathing together and what happens when one doesn't want to (and how to respect that). If that makes sense.

[thanka2]

I think modesty is a culturally loaded concept, and the qualifier 'proper' adds a whole other dimension to this as a cultural issue.

Of course, every family defines that differently. What I should just have directly said is that we aren't nudists. (But we have known some). We do put on clothes when guests come to our house. There is some accepted standard of "modesty" in every place and in Hong Kong, as well as where I grew up, the standard was that you don't show your private parts (breasts and genitals for women & genitals for men) to other people outside of your immediate family and then that is further interpreted according to age and family custom as well as the other things I talked about in my other post. Every culture and place does have a certain standard of modesty (what is okay and what is embarrassing or uncomfortable) and of course, it goes without saying that every culture is different in their interpretation of this as well as there are subsets in every culture that further interpret those standards differently.

[babymommy2]

What is in that book is crazy, my toddlers saw me naked all the time. I think they are more likely to think it is a big deal if never allowed to see. Seeing takes the mystery away, it is just seen as no big deal.my oldest is 5.5 now and he still sees me naked on occasion. It is rare now as he is off doing his own thing when I dress, but say we all go swimming, well there is no way I would send him into the mens bathroom alone, we all go into the family bathroom and use the same stall.

[zac08]

Actually I've read the section in that book about nakedness and it doesn't actually say that boys are naturally attracted to their mothers and therefore it could mess with them to see their moms naked... all it says is that after age 3, some kids may start to experience involuntary sexual feelings for the opposite sex and therefore it could be strange and confusing for them to see their parents naked (this could go for either sex - daughter/father or son/mother). Correct me if I am wrong Cara.

[carang]

you know what, i was reading through bit by bit, and i may have read a few different passages and must have taken it out of context... or maybe i only associated it with my son as he's the older one.

thanks zac, you are right in what you have said.

but it still made me wonder...

[zac08]

totally understand how it could have been taken out of context! i was just wondering if i missed something in that book... i use it as reference quite a bit and that perspective sounded rather 'unlike' something it would say.